Chapter 2

Ten seconds.

Ten seconds was all it took for Toby to process my words, and within those moments, his face went through different expressions.

His eyebrows pulled together, his forehead wrinkling as the words sank in, then his pupil subtly widened as he looked at me, and he squinted his eyes as if trying to determine if I was really the one in front of him.

“What?”

I swallowed rather painfully, my heart tugging for causing hurt to this man. He was the most perfect human, and yet I was causing him pain.

I don’t think my wolf would ever forgive me for what I was about to do. I have always denied her the opportunity to meet her mate because I knew that once they met, it was a done deal.

“I am leaving; it is time to take my place as the alpha. My pack needs me, and I have been away for too long.”

“Y-yea t-that.” Toby stuttered, and my heart lurched even more. “When are you leaving?” He asked me, his eyes still set on me, but I knew he wasn’t looking at me.

“If everything goes well, I will be leaving next week. I just have to tidy up some loose ends, and I will be gone.”

“Hmmm.” He made a small noise at the back of his throat, and he reached for his hair, running his hands through the perfectly groomed hair.

“Yea.” My voice broke as I replied, struggling to keep the emotions from my voice.

After what seemed like a moment, his eyes met me, holding my look, and my heart only sank even more. This man had been nothing but good, and all he wanted was a mate.

But the goddess likes to play with fate, and she had paired him with me. With Maddie, that would only bring sadness to his life.

But maybe this was better.

“I can tell that you have made up your mind.” He murmured under his breath, but my sensitive ears picked it up, and I nodded my head.

“I did a lot of thinking in my free time, and it was the only logical conclusion I could come to. There is nothing for me here, Toby.” There was a sharp inhale of breath as I called his name, but I continued. It was better to rip the bandage at once. “I can’t continue to toil for another man; I am an alpha, and it is against my nature to be under someone. I have endured this moment because of one thing, but there has been no progress. I can’t continue to stay here when everyone is doing something meaningful with their life and I am left stagnant.” As I started talking, the words only continued to pour out, but I stopped myself in time before I told him I was envious.

“Yeah, I understand.” This was what I wanted to hear, but hearing it didn’t make me feel better, not with that much emotionless voice.

He should be angry and be yelling at me, but Toby was never that man. He was too calm, too friendly, too nice.

The complete opposite of me.

“I wish I could stay here, Toby; I really wish I could. But I need to put myself first; you must understand this too.” I urged on, trying to justify myself, to ease his pain, but those brown eyes said otherwise.

The damage was already done.

“Maddie, I understand.” Toby said with a small smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “It is alright; I wish you well.” He reached for my hands, squeezing them gently, but they lacked the warmth of before.

I wished he would curse me out; I could bear it rather than the forced joy.

“You were going to tell me something?” I asked, and he blinked slowly.

“Oh.” He opened his mouth in an ‘O’ shape, nodding his head, but he closed it. “There is no need anymore; I have to go now. I think Kane needs me.”

It was a lie, and Toby had never lied to me, no matter how heavy the truth was.

“Yea, sure. You need to answer him.” I nodded my head while blinking my eyes furiously.

He mustn’t see me break.

I watched as he left through the door, quickening his pace as if he didn’t want to spend any more seconds in my presence.

I waited until I heard the door shut, and that was my undoing. I burst into tears, more like I broke down.

I crumbled onto the floor as if the strings that had been holding up were suddenly cut off and the tears pooled in my eyes. They were flowing from my eyes like a continuous stream, but I made no move to clean it.

I was a horrible human, a selfish person that was going to abandon her mate because of a position.

I can’t even imagine what my mother would think.

She was a very traditional woman, and she believed she had raised me as one. She would be shocked to hear that I left my mate for a position.

The tears even came more, and I cried until I had exhausted my tear duct, and my eyes were red and swollen. I dragged myself to bed and laid down, waiting for the time to pass by.

The sun had long gone down, but I made no move to even go for dinner, even though I hadn’t had lunch. I couldn’t hold anything in my stomach, and even if I could, I was too guilty to eat.

Every now and then, my eyes would glance at the wall clock, waiting for his arrival time. And like a programmed machine, Toby walked into the room at eight sharp, mumbled something in greeting, and headed to the shower.

I listened painfully as the water hit the tiles and it stopped, then he walked out of the room, undressing until he was left in his shorts and he hopped unto the bed.

Toby and I had always slept on the same bed, but with plenty of space on the king-sized bed as everyone kept to their side, but it had never been this awkward.

I could feel the great divide between us, and I feared that nothing would be able to bring us back.

“Goodnight.” I was the first to break the silence—a first.

“Night.” He replied in a voice that only tore me apart, and the bed creaked under us as he shifted, trying to find a suitable spot.

He spoke out some commands, and the light turned off, leaving the soft golden glow from the lamp. I looked up at the ceiling that had now mimicked the night sky, and I released a long sigh.

Toby was a fan of constellations, and he had made it his duty to teach me all about them when we were still trying to get to know each other.

Life was simpler then; he did all the chasing and I the running…

No Maddie, I shook my head trying to get rid of the thought. It would do me no good if I kept thinking of the past.

I need to move on.

I continue staring at the constellation, trying to make out what I could find while listening to his heartbeat.

After what seemed like eternity, his heart slowed and soft snoring left his lips, and I couldn’t help it. I reached over to his side, my hands hovering over his face as I stared at him.

He was a handsome man who had only love to give.

I don’t know what got into me, but I reached for my phone and took a picture.

Okay, that was a lie.

One picture couldn’t do justice to this face, so I confused clicking, taking as much as I could.

This was going to last me when I was gone.

It was only when I was satisfied with my work that I laid down on my bed; this time the sleep came swift, and I was in dreamland.

However, when I woke up the next day, it was to an empty bed; no surprise there. I stood up and did my morning routine, pulling a leather jacket over my outfit.

I needed it for an extra boost of confidence and because it kept people away, and just for effect, I slapped a frown on my face and was marching to Kane’s office.

The earlier I get started, the better.