LOGINANARA'S POV
I blinked as I tried to process his words. What did he mean by me also being his mate. Did he have another? My eyes flickered to Lyra who was arranging her clothes. The man was also quickly zipping up his trousers. I felt my cheeks burn when I realized that they had been up to more than kissing.
Lyra's eyes burned and flashed as she said, "The other maids are helping with preparations for the banquet, so what are you doing here?"
"Maid?" The man spluttered. "You mean,
she's a maid?"
"Yes, she is. Look at her, Cassian. What else do you think she's good for?"
Never had I wanted to reveal my identity as badly as I did then. I found myself actually opening my mouth to say something, to assure him that he was mistaken, that I was not a maid, that I was someone worthy to be called his mate.
But then Lyra was looking daggers at me. Her look promised swift, merciless retribution if I so much as said a word to contradict her.
"I can't believe this." Cassian shook his head angrily, shoved his fingers through his perfect curls. He aimed a kick at one of the potted plants. Then he glared at me, as though wishing I was the plant.
"I can't bloody believe this," he repeated. "How can I have two mates? Isn't that supposed to be rare? And then not only do I get to experience this rare phenomenon, but the other one who's supposed to be my mate happens to be a goddamn maid?" He let out a bitter laugh. "The moon goddess must be playing some sort
of cruel joke on me." Lyra's hand slipped into his and he held on tightly. His gaze immediately softened when he looked at her. He tucked a strand of her windblown hair behind her ear. "I mean, look at you, darling and then... look at her."
I didn't need a mirror to understand the comparison. Lyra and I were twins, but looked very unlike. She had curves, perfect glowing skin, a perfect face. With a diet that consisted mainly of scraps, I didn't even have enough flesh on my bones to start with so whatever shape I still possessed was hidden under the baggy, ill fitting clothes I wore. My cheeks were hollow, emaciated. It would be very hard for anyone to tell that Lyra and I had looked alike once.
Cassian’s ice blue eyes raked me over again and he muttered something about me looking like a stupid half-starved dog. His words sliced straight through me and left nothing but an ache in my chest.
I guess I looked a bit dumbfounded, standing there and just looking at them, but I was having the two hardest time believing that Lyra and I shared the same mate, and that he was as cruel and cruel as Lyra was.
Lyra sobbed. He immediately turned his attention to her. He held her shoulder, pulled her close.
"What's the matter?" he asked anxiously.
She shook her head tears fell from the
corner of her eyes. "It's just that... I just realized something..."
"What? Talk to me, please."
"Now that you have two mates, it means I will have to share you... with her!"
Lyra rested her head on Cassian's shoulder and she promptly dissolved into tears. It took a while for Cassian to get her to stop crying.
"What's your name, maid?" he snarled. He had to repeat himself before I realized he was talking to me.
"A…Anara," I stuttered.
Cassian wrapped an arm around Lyra's
waist, drew himself up to his full height and said, "I, Cassian Ashwood, today reject you, Anara as my mate."
"NO!" I shrieked. The tears I had been holding back spilled over. "You you can't"
Cassian took an intimidating step forward towards me.
And, snarling, "Who do you think you are to tell me what I can and can't do? He growled. "Say that again and that will be the last thing you say."
He was so furious I couldn’t get a word in. He stepped back and turned to Lyra. She gave him a watery smile.
Sticking her on a small table and amid an ordinary crowd, the child instantly noticed something missed something.
" Let's get out of here," he said. "The banquet will start in a few minutes."
"You go now. I will just I'm just trying to get my shit together." She sniffed daintily and pat at her moist cheeks with a handkerchief.
Cassian seemed hesitant about leaving her with me, but he nodded and started to leave. The second he turned his back, Lyra stopped crying. She pulled a face of such hatred that she was almost ugly. As I turned to leave, she clutched my wrist.
"You!!" she said, her anger trembling in her voice. "You've been keeping secrets."
"Let go. You’re hurting me,” I shouted.
Her long nails dug deeper into my flesh.
"Tell me. Tell me when you completed your shift or I swear, I'll make you life more miserable than it already is."
"Let go.”
I yanked my hand away from her grasp, lost my balance, almost fell. And then I was running, my vision blurred by tears. I stumbled and fell many times but I eventually made it to my house where I curled into a fetal position and cried harder than I had ever cried before.
On top of all the miseries I had endured, I had now been rejected by my mate and threatened by my sister. Lyra did not make idle threats. I was sure my life was about to take another downward turn. I cried until there were no more tears and then I just lay there, staring into the darkness.
A long while later, I didn't know exactly how long, I shuffled into the kitchens to get my dinner. I didn't have much appetite,
so I settled for a hot cup of tea which the cook all but shoved at me as she shooed me out of the kitchen. Back in my house, I managed to drink a few drops. I was so sad and tired that it seemed like too much work to crawl up to the nest of blankets I used as a bed. So I fell asleep on the cold, stone floor.
And then there I was in the dark empty space. One part of me knew I was dreaming, but the dream seemed too real. All at once I felt a stabbing pain in my head and it rapidly increased until I thought I would have an explosion in my head from the strength of it.
I shouted for help again and again, but the only response was the darkness that was closing upon me.
I could hear Seraphis's agonized howls and her voice desperately saying, "Ana, we’ve been drugged!" I feel... I'm losing consciousness."
Seraphis's voice began to grow faint. The thought of losing my wolf was intolerable. She was my only anchor in this cruel world. She was the one that had kept me sane when I was mocked, ridiculed by the pack and half starved.
"No! Stay with me!" I screamed.
"Run, Ana! You're in danger. Leave the Nightveil pack!" Seraphis cried.
And then she fell eerily silent.
POV: KaelenThe winter pack gathering was the largest event the pack held each year, the one occasion when every member of the territory was expected to be present and most of them were, because the winter gathering had a specific character that the other seasonal gatherings did not have, a quality of taking stock and affirming continuation, the communal act of looking at the full assembly of yourselves and deciding you were still the same people you had been and were going to keep being them. He had stood at the front of the great hall for every winter gathering of his Alpha tenure, which was now many years of them, and he had found them meaningful without finding them surprising. He had not expected to be surprised by this one.Anara came through the doors of the great hall at the seventh hour of the evening with the child against her chest, wrapped in the pale winter shawl that had been their grandmother's and was now hers, and the great hall did something he had never felt it do i
POV: AnaraThe letter from her father had been sitting on the writing desk for three days. She had not hidden it and she had not displayed it and she had not mentioned it to anyone because she had needed three days to understand what she felt about it before she could decide what to do with it. She had read it seven times. Each reading produced a slightly different version of the thing it made her feel, which was not unusual for correspondence from people who were complicated, and her father was nothing if not complicated in the specific way of people who had once been capable of love and had let that capability atrophy through years of choosing other things and were now, apparently, attempting to restore it.She showed it to Kaelen on the evening of the third day.She handed it to him across the dinner table without saying anything and he took it and read it with the care he brought to all the things that mattered to her, not quickly, not with the quality
POV: AnaraShe had been prepared this time. The first full moon after the birth she had been caught off-guard by the quality of what the bond carried from him, the specific grinding effort of it, the full moon cost that the curse still extracted even now, weakened as it was. The second full moon she had been ready but had hesitated at the door of the east wing room because hesitating had felt like the respectful thing, which she had later identified as incorrect reasoning and had been annoyed with herself about. The third full moon she did not hesitate. She went directly to the east wing room the moment the bond told her where he was and what the quality of him was, and she opened the door and she went in.He was on the floor. Not unconscious, not in crisis, but with the specific quality of someone who was managing something at the absolute edge of what they could manage, holding the line through discipline alone, which was where she always found him on full moon nights and which she
POV: AnaraShe woke at two in the morning and his side of the bed was empty and cool, which meant he had been gone for a while. The bond told her immediately where he was, the specific warm quality of him that she had learned to locate in the bond the way you located a familiar voice in a crowd, and it placed him in the nursery, which was not unusual. He went there sometimes in the night. She had known this for weeks and had not said anything about it, the same way she did not say anything about several of the things she had discovered him doing that fell outside the version of him that the world had been allowed to see.She got up and went to the nursery doorway and stopped.He was in the chair with the child against his chest in the position he had developed in the first weeks, the specific arrangement of his arm that supported the child's weight and kept their head at exactly the right angle, which she knew he had worked out through careful iteration and had felt his satisfaction t
POV: AnaraIt had been changing since the birth and she had not said anything about it for three weeks because she had been trying to understand it properly before she put it into language, and she had learned that the bond did not always yield to language quickly and that patience with it was the better approach. But at dinner on a Tuesday evening she looked at Kaelen across the table and decided she had waited long enough and she said, without preamble, "The pack bond is different."He set down his fork. He had the specific quality of attention he brought to things she said that he had not been expecting and considered important, the quality of someone who was rearranging whatever was at the front of his mind to make room for whatever she was bringing him. "Different how," he said."Larger," she said. "More specific. I can feel individual people in it now with a clarity I did not have before. Not just the general warmth of the collective. Specific people. This morning I felt Elder V
POV: AnaraIt had been changing since the birth and she had not said anything about it for three weeks because she had been trying to understand it properly before she put it into language, and she had learned that the bond did not always yield to language quickly and that patience with it was the better approach. But at dinner on a Tuesday evening she looked at Kaelen across the table and decided she had waited long enough and she said, without preamble, "The pack bond is different."He set down his fork. He had the specific quality of attention he brought to things she said that he had not been expecting and considered important, the quality of someone who was rearranging whatever was at the front of his mind to make room for whatever she was bringing him. "Different how," he said."Larger," she said. "More specific. I can feel individual people in it now with a clarity I did not have before. Not just the general warmth of the collective. Specific people. This morning I felt Elder V
Anara"Say it," he said."Say what?" I said."You know exactly what," he said.We were in the bedroom on a Saturday afternoon with the curtains drawn and the room carrying the particular warm atmosphere of a room that had been fully decided upon. He was above me with the expression that had stopped
KaelenThe tree was exactly as I remembered it.That should not have surprised me and did anyway. The split at the base into three separate trunks. The particular arrangement that had made it the best climbing tree on the entire territory when we were children, because the split gave you a standing
AnaraHe came on a Tuesday afternoon.I was at the window above the entrance hall and I was not admitting to myself that I was waiting there on purpose, though Seraphis found this particular self-deception quietly amusing in a way she was not attempting to conceal from me.Kaelen was at the gate wh
Anara"You are pulling away from me," I said.Thursday evening. He had been in the study since early morning. Dinner had been the right words at all the right times, which was its own particular kind of distance. The bond had been carrying a compressed quality since midmorning, the specific feeling







