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Author: AURORA STORM
last update Petsa ng paglalathala: 2026-03-25 23:49:59

Angelica

*present day*

“Fix that pretty face of yours!” Nicolas grabs my face, his thumb and index fingers digging into my cheek, hard enough to make me wince.

“God forbid the D’amatos think it’s not as perfect as everyone says it is,” he hisses, then releases my face from his grip, his eyes roaming up and down my body in disgust. Twisting his lips in a frown, he digs into his pocket and takes out a handkerchief which he uses to wipe his hands as though he touched something filthy. I should feel bad that he does this, but I don’t because it’s not like it’s the first time.

I’m filth. The filth he cannot get rid of.

“Yes, Father.” I don’t dare look him in the eyes.

One would think I would’ve grown a thick skin by now, but it is impossible, not when Nicolas never fails to remind me just how worthless I am at every given or taken opportunity.

I press my hands together behind me and give him my most subtle smile, fixing my pretty face just as he ordered.

I watch the man I call Father scan the D’Amato garden, no doubt to ensure we’re alone and no one saw him do what he did. Fortunately for him, we’re behind a tall shrub, safe from the view of the bodyguards manning the entrance to the garden so he returns his gaze to me, shoving his hands into the pockets of his black tux, his thick eyebrows furrowing as he watches me.

His eyes linger on my face, dark and dangerous, sending chills down my spine, a reminder that I’m nothing and I can only afford to be clothed in the high slit, midnight blue cocktail dress I have on because of his mercy.

“Behave yourself tonight. Nothing can go wrong,” Nicolas continues, as if he didn’t say these exact words to me fifteen times before leaving our house for the D’amatos.

Nicolas didn’t trust me, that’s why he pulled me to the famous D’amato garden after we arrived at the mansion, for this talk. Of course, I already know not to mess up or act in any way that would bring shame to the family, but the warnings I received about this party since the start of the week were far more than usual.

“You’re going to walk in there and mesmerize everyone in that room like your life depends on it,” Nicolas says. “Because it does.”

“Yes, Father.” I nod my head at him, biting down on my lower lip in fear that I will have to enter a room filled with more than twenty people. I let out a frustrated groan—mentally, of course.

“Let’s go in,” he orders, giving me one more once over. With my shaky hands behind me, there’s no way I can go in right now, and not with him.

“Let me at least prepare myself,” I say, blinking up at him, silently pleading.

Nicolas parts his lips like he’s about to say something, probably refuse me, but he decides against it. Instead, he pulls out his left hand from his pocket, angles his diamond-encrusted Rolex to his face, then raises his head and shoots me a look I know all too well.

“Two minutes. I shouldn’t look for you,” he says, voice deep and filled with an unsaid promise that I know for a fact will not favor me in the slightest.

I nod without asking for more time because that will only bring trouble, and I don’t need that—not now, not ever.

I watch Nicolas’s tall and lean figure as he walks toward the sliding door we came from, that connects the garden to the main house, his right hand still sitting in his pocket, with an air of confidence about him like he owns the place.

Now, that’s the thing about him. He knows he’s good-looking and uses it to his advantage. Natural waves in his hair, warm brown eyes people never stop complimenting, and that flawless smile my half-sister, Nadine, inherited from him.

It’s the kind of smile that makes his small eyes appear even smaller whenever he smiles, making him look trustworthy. Harmless.

Sometimes I think he practices in front of a mirror to make it even more flawless.

The moment he disappears inside, a heavy sigh escapes my lips, my chest loosening as I drag in a breath, then another, chasing the brief relief.

It’s not enough.

I need to leave.

RUN AWAY AND START OVER.

The words ring loudly in my head again, like it’s been doing since I wrote them down.

“Calm down,” I tell myself in an attempt to stop my heart from pounding loudly against my chest, but of course, it doesn’t work because not only was I forced to be here, but I have to be here with a lot of people.

Another heavy breath escapes me, and I’m begging to feel lightheaded with just the thought of walking into the mansion.

“You’re only going to be here for an hour,” I murmur, rubbing at my chest to ease my fast-rising anxiety. My fear of crowded places is the one weakness Nicolas despises most.

He hates weakness, and because of it, he rarely lets me leave the house—not after the times I embarrassed him when I was younger.

I inhale slowly, letting the cool night air fill my lungs, forcing some of the tension out. Only then do I realize my feet haven’t moved since I stepped into the garden.

“My two minutes are almost up,” I whisper, finally forcing myself forward but that doesn't stop me from taking a quick assessing look around the garden.

The D’amato name is known to anyone with status in the United States. Their influence stretches across businesses, across borders—even into politics, from what I’ve overheard Nicolas say. They are rich. Powerful. Feared.

And Nicolas works as the legal advisor to the family. That’s why Nicolas can afford a house at Brown Hill, and why we were invited to such a party with high-ranking businessmen and women, as well as politicians.

Nicolas has the D’amatos backing, having worked with the family since I was ten, so if there is anything I know about them, it’s that they thrive on appearances; they always look fancy and proper, and expect the same from the people who work for and with them. It’s why, even though Nicolas hates my guts, he hasn’t sent me away. Instead, I’m forced to live as his personal punching bag.

Not for much longer, I hope.

I bite down on my lower lip, forgetting for a second that I have lipstick on, gathering what little courage my five-foot-five body can muster before stepping inside.

The bass coming from the live band playing in the hall hits me, and I instantly feel lightheaded as the sound of music and people talking all at once reverberates through my head.

Gripping the hem of my long dress to hide my trembling fingers, I scan the room for a familiar face to help ease my anxiety, and I feel a wave of relief wash over me when I find Nicolas’s familiar figure in a corner. I hate him as much as he hates me, but right now familiar feels safer than everything else in this room.

His eyes find mine instantly, and his flawless smile stays, but something darker flickers beneath it.

He knows I took longer than my appointed two minutes.

With my eyes locked on him, I make my way to the corner where he is, politely ignoring the guests whose eyes won’t leave my face, and waiters who keep offering champagne in tall flutes to me.

“She’s finally here,” a woman who looks no older than forty-five but just turned sixty, coos at me. I watch her bright red lip transform into a smile that reaches her eyes, her acrylic nails digging lightly into my arm as she pulls me closer. Her floral scent which mixes with the overall scent of food in the hall calms me, and for a moment, I contemplate leaning into her more just to keep inhaling her scent.

I decide against it, of course, offering her a curt nod instead, with my default smile on my face.

“Good evening and happy birthday to you, Mrs. D’amato,” I bow my head slightly with a small smile.

“Thank you, darling,” Celia D’amato responds, her smile never leaving her face as she watches me. I step away from her stylishly, inching close to Nicolas and the rest of his family, whom I’m only just noticing have been standing next to him.

“She’s such a sweet girl,” Celia says and Nicolas nods. I know Celia is being sweet, but I don’t understand why she is being overly sweet to a girl she has only met three times in almost fifteen years, and each time was by chance since Nicolas never lets us get too close to the D’amatos. Ever.

“You trained her well, Nico,” She beams, then as if realizing Nicolas’s wife is standing next to him, she adds, “and I’m sure Sarah did a good job helping out.”

Sarah returns the smile, her fingers digging into her son’s shoulders, as if waiting for Celia to compliment her son.

Celia doesn’t.

Small as it is, it brings me little satisfaction because for years, Sarah’s primary aim in life was to get as close as she could to the D’amatos, but because Nicolas stopped us from interacting with the family, she hasn't been very successful.

Celia and Nicolas fall into a hushed conversation with her eyes darting from my face to Nadine’s, and the comfort I felt earlier begins to wither away. Even more so when a group of people approaches our corner to congratulate the woman, their eyes lingering just a little too long.

The comfort quickly fades, replaced by something much more familiar—fear.

Bile rises in my throat the more people approach us, causing the space to feel tighter as though the fresh air supply is cut off, making me feel claustrophobic and blurring my vision.

I place a hand on my chest and part my lips slightly for air, but I can’t take any in.

I can’t breathe.

“Where is your son?” I hear a muffled voice ask Celia, who shrugs before letting her eyes roam about the room, probably trying to find the son in question.

“Ah, there he is making his way over to us,” are the last words I hear before my head goes completely blank. My heartbeat increases and I feel my stomach revolt with nausea.

Before anyone can stop me, or before I can even stop myself, my legs begin to move, dancing around people to the exit I’d just come from. That is before I bump into a solid hard wall. With my shaky hands spread on the hard surface, I feel something wet trickle down my fingers, and it takes a total of five seconds to register that I have not only bumped into someone, but I also spilled their drink over their black three-piece suit.

Large hands grip my shoulders hard to keep me from falling, or causing further destruction, and with my right hand over my mouth, I mutter something that sounds close to an apology, but I’m not so sure myself since I am functioning on autopilot with one clear destination: the garden.

And one thought in my mind: Nicolas is going to kill me.

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  • The Pensive Gentleman   103.

    Angelica The sound of my heart shattering is not as loud as I always thought it would be. It’s silent, but I feel each piece falling apart as disappointment and embarrassment flood through my entire body.I’m still straddling him. My palms are on his warm chest, and I can feel his heart beneath, beating effortlessly.“Okay,” I mutter with my head hung, but it comes out as a whisper as I try to climb off his body. His fingers immediately grip my shirt tight, halting my movement. I feel the urge to lift my eyes to his face, to see the expression or emotion there. Yet I don’t, because I’m scared of what I’ll see there. It also doesn’t help that the grip only lasts three seconds before he guides me to the bed.He doesn’t look back at me when he gets up, or even when he walks away into the bathroom. While I sit on his side of the bed, staring at the closed door and wondering what went wrong. He’d been the one to kiss me, so why would he stop out of the blue? I should be angry, but as

  • The Pensive Gentleman   102.

    Angelica I can’t concentrate.I’ve been going back and forth between the same two pages over the past hour now, and yet I can’t get Marciano’s angry voice out of my head. I also can’t wrap my head around why he’d been so angry.‘You’re lucky you didn’t go there to meet him, Angelica. Also very fucking lucky you didn’t try to—’He’d said. What was he going to say? That I didn’t try to do what?I close my study book, burying my head in my hands.Marciano is hard to figure out. I’ve known this, but I’ve also never been left so confused by him before.He was so angry yet he pressed into me, and held me like I belong against him.‘Don’t make me keep you locked up here again. I’m not a very patient man.’ He meant that. And that’s what scares me.Because if he decides to keep me locked up like he said, my escape from this life and this marriage might be a little more difficult.I shake my head.That can’t happen. I won’t let it. I don’t care what I have to do, but I won’t go back to living

  • The Pensive Gentleman   101.

    Angelica “What’s with the bag?” It doesn’t immediately register that his hand is on my waist until I feel a tight squeeze urging me to respond.But I can’t. My heart is somewhere in my throat because I’ve suddenly forgotten how to speak.Marciano glowers at me, clenching his jaw. He’s furious. My grip around my bag hardens and I swallow.His gaze sweeps over the street before settling on me again. If it’s possible, he looks angrier. Scarier.“Why are you alone? Where’s Gypsy?”I can’t avoid pressing my lips together. Of all the things I thought would happen today, this one never crossed my mind.Why is he here? He said he’d be home late so I thought he was traveling. Why is he here of all places?He raises his second brow, waiting expectantly for an answer.My heart is pounding so loudly that my head hurts. I have to think of something quick.“I-I got lost…?” I respond, but it comes out more as a suggestion than a statement. Marciano moves back a little, though his hand still sit

  • The Pensive Gentleman   100.

    Angelica I pace back and forth in the room so much the carpet should have grooves in it now.Marciano left almost forty minutes ago, but I’ve been stuck on the same thought.Weighing my options, I don’t have as many restrictions as I did before, but now there’s a higher risk of them figuring out what I’m doing.Gypsy especially.He’s indeed more protective of me than Ky is because he goes everywhere with me, but I just can’t shake the feeling that he’ll be the first to rat me out. I pause, my eyes finding Marciano’s card on the bed. “What if I tell him I’m going shopping?” I mutter. It makes sense because Marciano’s card will prove it’s totally alright, but there are barely any boutiques or shopping malls there, plus Gypsy wouldn’t let me go shopping alone.I let out a breath, already feeling defeated.“I’ll figure something out,” I say to encourage myself, but deep down I don’t think this will work. Still, I hop into the shower for a quick wash, and afterwards I get dressed in a p

  • The Pensive Gentleman   99.

    Angelica I spring to my feet immediately, the chair scraping against the ground as I push it back, throwing my napkin on the chair.“Excuse me.” Without waiting for a response, I turn around, marching out of the room, even with my name echoing behind me. I don’t stop, even when I hear the sound of his chair moving backwards, and I don’t wait when I hear him clear his throat. I walk straight out, only to bump into our waiter.He steadies me with both arms on my shoulders, eyes wide as he stares down. I step away from him with a small nod.“Restroom,” I manage to force out, one hand over my mouth, the other on my stomach. The waiter points toward the restroom, his brows still furrowed in confusion, and I practically sprint there.My vision is blurry as I grip the first thing my hands find to steady myself. Only when I blink through the tears do I realize it’s the wash basin.Bile rises to my throat, and I grip the sink until my fingers ache.Then I hear it.“Angelica~” In a sing-son

  • The Pensive Gentleman   98.

    Angelica As I spray a sealing spray on my face, I realize that ever since Marciano told me we’d go out for dinner tonight, I didn’t worry once about meeting a crowd. Whenever Nicolas would tell me I had to come with the rest of the family, I’d always be left feeling anxious and nauseous. And it would never go away until after the event was done and I was back home. I dreaded hearing I had to leave the house.Tonight, somehow, it doesn’t feel the same.I feel the immediate tightening of my face as the spray activates, holding my makeup still. I smile at my reflection.I’m no makeup professional, but I think I did a decent job even though one of my winged liner is flying in a higher direction than the other. As someone who hasn’t practiced in a long while due to one situation or the other, I give myself some credit.With my middle finger, I wipe the edges of my lips to ensure my lip gloss is right on track without spillage. Then I let out a breath as I take a step back to see my full

  • The Pensive Gentleman   94.

    Angelica Marciano turns around, but he does it so nonchalantly like it’s the last thing he wants to do right now. I turn around too, putting my back to him as I quickly throw the paper into my laundry basket, then I grab the first thing that catches my eyes to cover myself with.It’s a flimsy, ba

  • The Pensive Gentleman   89.

    Marciano “Nicolas.” Her voice breaks in a way I’ve never heard before, with only one emotion pouring out of her—stark fear. She’s not just afraid, she’s terrified. And that rubs me off the wrong fucking way to the point where I almost regret bringing her here. Hearst opens his eyes, and when

  • The Pensive Gentleman   85.

    Angelica I sit quietly in the car, my hands on my thighs, picking at my fingers, hoping the sound relays to Marciano that this is the last thing I want to be doing right now.But like always, Marciano can’t be bothered. His eyes are buried in the iPad screen he’s holding, and I literally have to

  • The Pensive Gentleman   81.

    Angelica "What?" I ask again, genuinely shocked to the bone, staring at him with wide eyes."You heard me," he says nonchalantly and tugs on my arm. My gaze drops to his hand, then lifts to his face. There's this dead-set look in his eyes, surprisingly non-threatening, but it has an edge that tel

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