How Many Funniest Friends Quotes Are From Chandler?

"Sign the divorce, Eliana. And I will add two zeros to the settlement check." My husband of two years, Calvin Franco said as he threw the divorce papers in front of me as I sat flipping through a magazine. Little did he know, I was the heiress of a multi-billion-dollar company. I make more than he has ever made in his life, in just one week. And when he finds out, he will surely regret looking down on me. The only thing that worried me most was my best Friend Brooks finding out. I had made a bet with him before I married Calvin, and if Brooks finds out I'm getting a divorce from Calvin, it means only one thing- Calvin's career is about to be abolished.

Charlie Wayne’s life is perfect. Or it was. As a VP who commands boardrooms and a playboy who elegantly ends every date at his door by 3 AM, Charlie’s world is built on control. But lately, his system has a glitch. A streak of bizarre, comically bad luck—flat tires at dawn, mysterious fire alarms, untimely food poisoning—keeps derailing his plans. His flawless exit strategy is in shambles. Carly Dorrington’s life is a lie. But a necessary one. After a blowout fight with her father over their family companies’ merger, Carly needs a place to stay. Where better than with her childhood best friend, Charlie? It’s just temporary. Just two best friends sharing a space. It has nothing to do with the two decades she’s spent loving him from the sidelines, or the quiet hope that maybe, just maybe, proximity will make the world’s most oblivious man finally see her. Now, under his roof, the "coincidences" multiply. Charlie’s chaotic love life grinds to a halt just as Carly’s presence becomes a permanent, comforting fixture. His sacred rules don’t seem to apply to her. His peaceful solitude feels warmer with her in it. As the lines of their friendship blur, Charlie is left to wonder: Is Carly the calm in the center of his storm… or is she the one who’s been stirring it up all along? Note: This is a slow-burn, dual-POV story about best friends, blurred lines, and the long game. If you find yourself wondering"where is this going?" in the early chapters... keep reading. Everything becomes clear in Chapter 4. The foundation is being laid for a reason. Thank you for trusting the process.

"So, what do you think about my brilliant idea?" he continued this time, with a glimmering smile on his face. "My name is Ghino Frost, by the way. Just like you, I was betrayed and cheated by the ones I loved the most."     Ghino's proposal completely tempts me as it makes me realize the reason why I dream of someone impossible. Dylan is my best friend - the love of my life.     And it appears that my one-of-a-kind dream - holding his hands - kissing his lips - and making love with him forever stays in a dream. Dylan and I will never happen.     But I badly need anything that can distract me and survive for the night. Just for the night. "Fine," I finally spoke up after a few minutes of considering everything. "Let's do it. Let's have sex."

As I casually opened the online forum, a trending post at the top caught my eye. [Share the wildest thing you’ve ever done.] I clicked on the second comment, which seemed to contain just one line. [Without a doubt, it was the night before my buddy’s wedding when I had his wife come over for a “quality check.”] However, the poster kept adding to the thread. [That night, the woman tricked that idiot into thinking it was a bachelorette party, but she actually spent the whole night at my place. [She said she didn’t want to sleep with just one man forever and needed one last wild night before tying the knot. [By the end of the night, her throat was nearly raw from all the screaming. [We kept going until sunrise, right there in the wedding car her husband was supposed to pick her up later that day.] [Not only that, but even after they got married, this fool kept bringing his wife over to my place for dinner. [He’d help me in the kitchen while I pinned his wife against the fridge and kissed her. [He’d be glued to the game in the living room while his wife knelt in the bathroom and took care of me. [One time, when he passed out drunk on my couch, his wife and I had our own fun on the carpet beside him. [Every time he rolled over, we’d both jump. It was the thrill of knowing we could get caught at any moment.] The image loaded, revealing the familiar interior of the wedding car. The lucky charm I had given my wife dangled from the rearview mirror. My fingers momentarily stiffened, and I nearly dropped my phone. A wave of nausea rolled in my stomach as a chill crept up my spine. Just then, a hand appeared in my field of vision, waving in front of me. “Calvin, what are you zoning out for? You’re at my place, and you’re still on your phone. Come on. Dig in while it’s hot.” Wyatt Preston, my friend, grinned at me. Yet, his eyes kept straying toward my wife, Queenie Jennings, who was sitting beside me.

The news of Jared Foley and me breaking up completely stuns our social groups. After all, we've been together for ten whole years. Even the invitations to our wedding are printed. When faced against our friends' doubts and questions, I merely reply, "We broke up over a joke." At a classmates' reunion on the day before, the drunken Chuck Garner, the class president, suddenly asks Jared a question. "Heather's your fiancee, whereas Paige is your first love. Who would you rescue if both of them fall into the sea at the same time?" Jared doesn't even bother glancing at me as he answers immediately, "Paige, of course!" For a moment, the atmosphere in the private room becomes awkward. Soon, someone quickly eases the tension. "Have you all forgotten that Heather used to be the swimming champion back then? She doesn't need Jared to save her!" Jared shoots it down immediately. "Nah. It's because Heather talks too much." A pause later, Chuck bursts out laughing. "It's been ten years! To think that the top scorer has picked up a sense of humor!" Everyone else joins in on the laughter except for me. After all, I know that Jared is speaking the truth. He's already sick and tired of me rambling on and on when I share every little detail that happens in my life with him every day. That's why he mutes my chatbox on WhatsApp. I've always thought that this is a part of Jared's personality. That is, until I accidentally stumble upon the chat history between Jared and Paige. He even makes sure to take photos of what he has for breakfast and sends them to Paige every morning. Only then do I realize that Jared isn't cold and aloof by nature. He's just cold and aloof toward me. In that case, why should I stubbornly cling to the ray of light that has never illuminated my life?

My roommate was Rachel Travis, and something about her behavior always felt… off. On social media, she hit the like button on every single person’s posts, except mine. Whenever she asked for help, I was always there. However, the one time I asked her for a pad, she wrinkled her nose and called it "disgusting". For my birthday, I invited the whole dorm to dinner. When hers rolled around, she invited everyone, except me. Then, I saw my boyfriend, Ryan Cooper, at her birthday party. That’s when I finally snapped and confronted her. She looked at me, wide-eyed, all innocence. "What? Everything’s fine. Why are you acting like this? You’re just too sensitive." Even the other girls in the dorm piled on, saying I was overreacting and telling me I needed therapy. So maybe I was "too sensitive". Fine. Then, I would treat her exactly the way she treated me. Let’s see how she liked it.