A Defeated Girl

Wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand, Claire wept like a child while staring outside the window. Her swollen eyes failed to appreciate the peaceful scenic view of the beautiful garden when deep down she was battling with the storm of misery and helplessness she had been facing every day. But Adrian's ruthlessness wasn't her problem; it was his silence that killed her every time.

How can he stay so calm after seeing her go through so much atrocity? Doesn't his heart go out for her? Like, how can he turn so indifferent to her when he has known her all his life? She failed to understand.

Placing her palms on the sill, Claire lowered her head, unable to rein in the emotions swirling inside her heart.

"W-Why? I... I didn't even d-do anything. Why... W-Why every time I... *sob* lose in front of him?"

She was always scolded by the teachers, held responsible for the ruckus created by Adrian and faced the punishments as he cleverly got a clean chit. It's not like she became a victim of injustice for the first time, but at least she had someone at the university she could rely on. Professor Lee was her sole saviour, but now that rich freak has stolen him from her as well.

Lost in thought, Claire suddenly choked on her tears and burst into violent coughs. She started rubbing her chest rapidly while scanning the surroundings for her water bottle. Her face started turning red as her body sagged against the window frame.

All of a sudden, she felt a warm hand on her back, balancing her. Panicked, she tried to look up when someone lent her a bottle. Her survival instincts suppressed her curiosity to find the stranger as she quenched her thirst first. She could feel someone drawing circles on her back as the Angel sent from heaven saved her life. As soon as her breathing turned even, she snatched her bottle from him and jerked away from his touch.

"Are you alright?"

"Keep your fake concern in your pocket, Noah." Her voice was laced with venom as she shot a murderous glare at the dark-haired boy standing near her.

"You saved my life, now I owe you one. Tell me how I can repay you so that I can quickly free myself from this uncalled favour?"

Noah didn't miss the hatred and disgust dripping off her face. He tried to maintain his composure, but her acidic remarks burned his cloak of indifference as anger took over his features.

"Just answer the damn question."

The coldness his voice carried penetrated her soul. His narrowed eyes and the way his breathing turned ragged indicated that he was highly offended by her words, but does she care? Hell no.

Scoffing, she turned her head to the side and wiped her tears, "Don't you have eyes? Can't you see it yourself?" He can drop his act now.

Noah seared at how she wasn't even acknowledging his presence.

"Fine then."

Saying sharply, he didn't wait a second and turned to leave. Claire closed her eyes, but soon her body started to shake as she heard his footsteps fading into the distance. She curled her fingers into a fist to ebb the pain she felt as he once again abandoned her. Leaving her in a desolate state without bothering to think about how she will survive.

"YEAH!!! LEAVE!!! LEAVE JUST LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO!!!"

His steps came to a halt, hearing her scream that was a blend of anguish and accusation.

Noah didn't turn around. He didn't have to, as he heard her running towards him.

Claire had had enough of his silence. She stopped in front of him and grabbed the lapels of his leather jacket firmly.

"You know. You always know everything, Noah, then why??" A broken cry slipped through her lips as she pulled him closer. "Why don't you do anything?" Saying that, she burst into tears.

Burying her face in his chest, she continued, "Why can't you see it, Noah? Why don't you help me? Don't you see how hard it is for me to bear his inhumane behaviour? How badly I am carrying this excruciating pain and surviving this hell every day. Why can't you see, huh?? Why don't you do anything??" Screaming, she pushed him only to stumble backwards. Noah quickly grabbed her forearms, but Claire whisked away from his touch while glaring at him with spite.

"Stop this pretence. Stop trying to play my hero when you're a wolf in disguise. You know what, Noah? Indeed, Adrian hurts me, bullies me, but what you did was THE WORST!! I despise you much more than I despise him. And you know why, right? Don't you? Say it, Noah."

Her voice started shaking as she looked at him with desperation. But Noah was calm as the sea. His face bore no expression as he took her every accusation, every attack, silently.

Her body suddenly turned limp, so he quickly circled his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. Claire grabbed his jacket for support as she looked in his eyes, trying to search for the same warmth in which she bathed once.

"You were my best friend, Noah!!"

Her resolve finally broke as she threw herself into his arms. Wrapping his arms around his torso, she started wailing like a child.

"He hurts me so much, Noah. Why don't you help me? He is bullying your Pumpkin. How can you keep quiet after seeing it? I need you. I need my Noah. Where is he? Where have you hidden him? Why did you snatch him away from me, Noah? I can't fight with Adrian anymore, Noah. Please be my saviour. Help me."

Her every word increased the burden of guilt in his heart. Yes, he saw everything, heard everything, but never for once came for her rescue. And that's what stopped him from embracing her. He neither pushed her away nor made any effort to soothe her. Just remained still like a statue, a toy or an anchor, whatever she labels him, so that she can empty her heart.

Her heart-wrenching sobs echoed in the hallway as she continued crying in his embrace. Noah knew Claire would be on the eighth floor; it was her favourite hiding spot because it was an isolated area. Though he has ended their friendship on his terms, his shadow never left her, not even for a second. He always keeps an eye out for her, and that's what peeves Claire as he watches her getting hurt, but only comes to check on her when she is alone.

Claire was getting frustrated by his silence. Raising her head, she lifted her gaze only to find him staring in nought.

"You don't have anything to say, Noah?" She gritted. Noah simply blinked. Agitated, she slapped his hands away and grabbed his collar.

"Why don't you say anything? Have you turned this heartless? Did you even kill your conscience the day you ended our friendship?"

"Cut it now, Claire."

Noah finally spoke as he looked down at her. Her jaw dropped as his eyes held no sympathy for her. He wasn't a bit moved by her tears, as if her words did not affect him. Her lips quivered as she again felt the urge to cry at how unbothered he seemed.

Clenching his jaw, Noah gripped her hands and peeled them off his jacket before throwing them away harshly.

"You really want to know how I feel? Then fucking listen."

A cold shiver ran down her spine as he inched closer to her and looked at her with disdain.

"I am fed up with you." He growled darkly, tearing her heart into pieces. Grabbing her left forearm in a vice grip, he yanked her close, his eyes shooting lasers.

"I warned you, didn't I? I did cite my reasons before breaking our friendship, and they were genuine for me, Claire. I know I did wrong, but not for once, I stop worrying for you. I convinced you a hundred times to stop engaging with Jeons, but you never paid heed to my warnings. So now if you are in this mess, then it's all your doing."

Claire gasped in pain as his grip turned bruising. Circling her fingers around his wrist, she tried prying his fingers off, only to gasp in shock as Noah thrust her forward, making their noses collide against each other. She blinked her tears as their faces came so close to each other she could literally feel his hot breath fanning her lips as he looked at her with eyes filled with fury.

"Stop blaming everyone, Claire, when you invited this trouble yourself. So now fucking deal with it."

Claire couldn't help but cry at how ruthless he was sounding. He was practically telling her to die.

"N... Noah"

"It's so hard for me to watch you in this state. I don't enjoy it, Pumpkin. But I can't help it." His voice suddenly turned soft as his grip loosened. Claire looked at him with surprise, but was startled when he suddenly cupped the back of her head and joined their foreheads. Her hands automatically flew to his shoulders as she held him for support.

"Why can't you understand? Watching him bully you kills me, but what kills me more is that I love you. I can't stop worrying about you. Can't stop thinking about you."

For the first time, Noah expressed his feelings, leaving Claire speechless. His eyes were closed as he ripped his heart open while she watched him with teary eyes. Placing her palm on his cheek, she tried to calm him when he suddenly grabbed her face in his hands. Her heartbeat ceased watching his ebony orbs doused in blinding anger.

"Yes, I love you and I so... so fucking feel helpless in front of him, but I can't do anything. I am unable to do anything. I can't help you, and I had made myself clear to you that day, but you keep repeating it." He tried clarifying his actions, but it only burned her.

"But you're the only friend I got, Noah. No one talks to me." She retorted, earning a deep sigh from him.

"I am helpless, Claire."

"But he hurts me, Noah."

"I am helpless," he kept repeating, making Claire snap.

"Then what's the point of having a friend when you can't stand for me!!!" She yelled angrily, having had enough of his nonsense.

"When did I ever say that I am your friend?"

His curt and harsh reply shattered all the expectations she had for him.

"I had cut all ties with you the day I ended my friendship with you, so why are you still relying on a hope? Wishing for a change in my heart when I made myself very clear that I would always side with the Kingsleys if you go against them, even if you are right."

*Smack *

His words were cut off with a slap. Noah closed his eyes and turned his head back to Claire, who was watching him while breathing heavily.

"Yes, you did. Thanks for making me remember Mr Noah Carter." She smiled bitterly with teary eyes. Noah sealed his lips in a thin line as he failed to find any words in his defence. He went overboard, and no matter what he says, nothing would counter the intensity of hatred in her eyes, which was directed at him.

"I am really so stupid. You are right, even after everything, I am still hoping to see a day when my Noah will be back, but you already made it clear that he is dead. Fine. I promise I will never call him and never bother you either. You're damn right. This is my battle. I bought this on myself. You made your choice clear, and I made mine. You decided to be a bootlicker while I stand for my rights."

Noah's expressions instantly darkened at the derogatory term she used for him. Claire smirked, watching his mask of indifference slipping off as fury crashed through his veins.

Closing the distance, Noah glowered at her petite frame, "I had my reasons, Claire."

He spoke with clenched teeth, but Claire only snickered in response. She knew he was trying to drill the fact in her head that what he did was right.

"Do hell with your reasons. Stop justifying your cowardly deeds. You should be ashamed of yourself, Noah. I even regret befriending you." Spitting it, she didn't wait for his reply and turned to leave.

Claire had hardly taken a few steps when she was pulled back by a harsh tug on her left forearm. Her body collided with his sturdy frame as Noah glared at her furiously.

"What makes you think I will let you walk away after you call me a coward and yourself a warrior when in reality it's the fucking opposite?"

Claire punched his chest as she glared back at him. "Why? Isn't it the fucking truth?"

The vein in her head was about to explode as she had lost all her patience today. Noah was equally angry, but then he shot her a sickening smile as he pulled her closer by her and snarled on her face.

"You're so fond of hearing the truth, right then let me enlighten you. Yes, I am a coward who accepted defeat from that wealthy asshole who held the power to bury you six feet under because I wanted to protect my parents. I did it to save them, while you decided to lock horns with him because you have no one to rely on."

Her face lost colour as Noah shoved the truth in her face. His grip on her eventually loosened as he moved away from her while sizing her up and down.

"You're not the only fool, Claire. I am also one, as I am constantly expecting from an orphan to understand the worth of a family."

His voice, not for once, wavered as he walked past her while Claire stood in silence, completely devastated by his words.

*****