Chapter 31: A Visitor

I never thought something like this would happen to us.

Those words kept circling round and round in my head. Sometimes they were different, only slightly, like I never thought this would happen to me or I never thought this would happen to my Mum or Zach.

I was in shock, Doctor I-forgot-his-name said. Which would explain why I felt so numb.

I had only been awake for about a hour now. Apparently I'd woken up quite quickly after reaching the hospital. My injuries weren't bad. A cut on my forehead, bruising from the seat belt and a swollen knee. Or something like that. I honestly couldn't take in half the things he said. I thought he mentioned I pulled something in my shoulder too. Or was it my neck?

I didn't know. They didn't hurt anymore either way. The pain relief they gave me fixed that.

I still couldn't find it in me to believe that this happened. One second, we were on our way home. The next, we were in hospital and my Mother was half dead and Zach had yet to wake up.

"This is my fault," I whispered into my knees, guilt gripping my heart like a fisted hand.

"Hey. Don't say that, princess," A familiar voice told me from the doorway. "Don't you dare say that."

My eyes widened and I slowly lifted up my head. There was no way in hell he was here. But as soon as I peered towards the entrance, I was proven wrong. I swallowed thickly, wondering if I was hallucinating from my head wound. "J-Julian?"

He was standing there with sad eyes, messy hair and familiar full lips I'd fantasised about many times. This couldn't be real, I denied, taking in the designer jeans and tight, black shirt which showed off his muscle and boy, did he have muscle. He held a bunch of pretty red roses in his hands. "I'm here."

Are you? I wondered but then decided I honestly didn't care. I'd happily be a crazy person if it meant Julian was here with me right now. I suddenly didn't feel so lost and alone.

"What are you doing here?" I wanted to smile. I really did but the situation wouldn't allow me to do it. My arms tightened around my legs where they were pulled up to my chest.

He stepped into the room, looking handsome and nervous. "You don't remember?" He questioned, cautiously approaching until he reached the chair next to my bed.

Remember what, exactly? "I remember I was in a car accident."

He nodded slowly. "Is that all?"

"I think so," I replied, unsure. Was this even real life anymore? First I was in a car crash where my best friend was badly hurt and mother most likely wouldn't make it, and now I was sitting here talking to the man I'd been falling in love with, who I had yet to meet in person. 

He licked his lips and leaned forward, elbows on his knees and flowers in his hands. "I was there after your accident. I stayed with you until we got the door off so the paramedics could tend to you," he explained to me softly.

Something about what he said rings a bell. It was a memory I thought I might have but every time I tried to grab it, it moved even further away from my grasp. "Oh," Is the only thing I have to respond with. Then I managed to give him a watery smile. "It's nice to finally meet you."

He smiled back but it's pained and small. "You too, baby. You're so much more beautiful in person."

That awakened the butterflies in my belly. It was almost as if they hadn't realised it was actually him until that very moment. I hid my face into my shoulder, mostly because I looked like hell and I couldn't believe the first time he meets me is when I was in such a state. "Thank you," I mumbled.

He frowned and reached a hand towards my face. A thumb traced my cheek, just underneath my eye. "You don't have to hide from me. You know this." Wrong words. Or right words.

Depends on how you look'd at it. My dam burst and that numb feeling I had since I'd woken up dissolved, leaving me flooded with a thousand different emotions I had no idea how to deal with.

A sob made it's way up my throat and I screwed my eyes shut. Immediately Julian was on his feet, placing the flowers down somewhere I couldn't see and sitting on the side of my bed, careful of the wires which were sticking out of me.

"Shh, baby," he cooed to me softly, wrapping his strong arms around my tiny form. I tried to hold back my tears and found myself trembling with the effort. "I'm here. You don't have to be strong right now. I'll look after you, I promise. I've got you.

Shh, I've got you." I cling to him and cried my heart out. I cried for how terrified I was and still am. I sobbed for my Mum and Zach. I let it all out and he held me throughout the whole thing, rocking me back and forth.

Sometimes words escape me in between my wailing. Things like please and god no. It only made him hold me that much tighter.

It took me a long time to calm down. I was vaguely aware of him mumbling comforting words to me. At one point, I thought a nurse came in and checked something. I was in my own world though, not paying much attention to either, and in this little world Julian was my protector. It felt like I was a baby chick and he was the egg shell, keeping me safe until I was ready to face it all.

"I'm so glad you're here," I confessed with a hiccup. My eyes were sore from all the crying and snot was running down my nose, making it hard to breathe. His shoulder, where I buried my head, was soaked.

"There's no where else I'd rather be," he murmured against my knotted, messy hair. A hand smooths over it and down my back before making it's way up to my neck. It remained there and held me close. "Thank you so much for the flowers," I sniffled. "They're beautiful."

"Shh, it's fine baby."

My features morphed into agony once more. "It's not fine. It was my fault. They're almost dead because of me! I shouldn't of argued at my Mum. If I hadn't, she would have seen the car. She was just trying to protect me."