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Lahat ng Kabanata ng Reclaiming His Ex-wife; At all costs! : Kabanata 151 - Kabanata 160

220 Kabanata

TWENTY THREE

ASHLEY'S P. O. V Sometimes, the hardest part of loving someone is knowing when to let them go. And that was what I did, I let Kellan go, now I'm all alone. Lying down in bed, staring at the ceiling, asking myself too many ‘what ifs’ What if I had just told Kellan about the baby? What if he finds out and hates me for it? What if I can't raise this child myself? What if this baby dies too? Too many thoughts sit with me in this silence. It's been four days since I walked out of Kellan's office. Four days since I went in there, and broke us both more than we already were What if Kellan isn't holding up well? I can't get over the hurt and pain on his face, the way Kellan held me with trembling fingers and kissed me softly. Against my will, tears slipped down my cheek, warm and wet. I glanced over to my right side, where the divorce papers were sitting on top of my vanity. I haven't sent it to the lawyer Yet I should be happy, right? I should be celebrating because this was

TWENTY FOUR

ASHLEY'S P. O. V. There was something different about today.I didn't cry during the night, and I actually looked forward to the day ahead. That's what's different. Today, I'd get to see my baby and know if it's a boy or a girl.Something like an excited squeal escaped my lips as I stood in front of the full-length mirror, in only shorts and a bra. My baby bump was growing bigger. I rested my hand on the curve of my belly. My eyes were tired from too much thinking and crying, but I didn't care about that, not today.Today, I chose not to worry over things I have no control over and focus on the brighter side.Am I confused and worried about what life will be like for me? YesAre my feelings spiralling, do I sometimes regret forcing Kellan to sign the divorce and other times applaud myself for doing just that? Also yesBut would I let myself keep on drowning in things that have already happened? NoI'm going to be a mother, that is all that matters.My stomach fluttered just thinking

TWENTY FIVE

ASHELY'S P. O. VI needed a nurseryWhich meant I needed an apartment.Which also meant, I needed an apartment far from where I could bump into Kellan since I wasn't ready to face him and tell him about the baby.July had been a big help to me, letting me stay longer than I probably should have, but now that I was going to have a daughter, I couldn't keep inconveniencing her, even though she says otherwise.Which was why I was scrolling through listings on a real estate site at eight in the morning, a tablet in one hand and a half-melted smoothie in the other.July was still curled up asleep on the couch, one hand resting on top of the couch while the other tucked under a fluffy throw pillow. July worked in a marketing department and had come home last night extremely tired, She crashed on the sofa and hadn't gotten up since, We would have woken her up, but luckily she's on leave for the rest of the week.I leaned back into the other couch, Jackie by my side as we browsed through apa

TWENTY SIX

ASHLEY'S P. O VJackie, July, and I stood outside the building. The sun beamed down on us as we squinted our eyes and looked up and up and upJuly scratched her scalp, her whole face was red from being under the sun for too long, but she was too stubborn to get under a shade “So....it's a six-story building. Okay”Jackie slipped her hands into the pockets of her jeans, her eyes slowly taking in the reddish-brick exterior and pale stone trim. “And the apartment available is on the sixth floor, Ashley have you considered how inconvenient it might be to carry groceries up there with your pregnancy” Jackie pulled out one hand and stretched it up for emphasis I chuckled, then paused as my hand instinctively went to the curve of my belly. “It's a baby Jackie, not a disability, and besides I'll use the elevator. That's what they're meant for”Jackie shook her head like she couldn't comprehend what I was saying. “What if the elevator breaks down and you have to hurry to the hospital for som

TWENTY SEVEN

KELLAN'S P. O. VNumbness was a good thing.A safe thing.And to stay numb, I worked myself past possible limits. I reached exhaustion, and I worked past it, like a mindless machine. I was skipping meals, living off caffeine and fury and....pain. For someone like me, someone who lost the most beautiful thing in his life, there were no breaks for me. Sleep was something I couldn't afford.Day after day, I just... worked.It was the only way I knew how to survive since Ashley left with my heart in one hand and divorce papers in the other. Working was what got me into this mess, it was also the only thing that kept me from feeling everything I didn’t have the courage to feel.A few days ago, I passed out right here in the middle of my office. I woke up ten hours later with a stiff neck, pins and needles pricking me everywhere, and absolutely no memory of falling asleep.That was good too. Safe.It was better than dreaming of Ashley. It was better than seeing her face on every surface,

TWENTY EIGHT

ASHELY'S P. O. VThe envelope in my hand felt heavier than normal paper should.I've had it for weeks, I made Kellan sign this, but somehow, I hadn't been able to take it to my lawyer so the divorce process could be finalized.But now that I was getting my apartment and fixing the pieces of my life, I couldn't drag this longer anymore.Kellan and I were done. Period.A hard swallow worked its way down my throat as I held the envelope to my chest. The office was surrounded by charts and some pictures of my lawyer from when he was in law school, It smelled like legal ink and air conditioning.The door behind me cracked open “Ah, Ms Ashley. Sorry to keep you waiting” He greeted, turning around his chrome desk to take a seat “It's no problem, I haven't been waiting for long” I replied quietly.He leaned back into his seat, his eyes being his glasses sharp and assertive. “I see you've gotten Mr Langston to sign the divorce,” he said, nudging his chin to where I held the papers too tightly

TWENTY NINE

ASHELY'S P.O.VI stepped out into the street, the cool evening breeze made me smile.Today I went to the doctor's. He confirmed that my little girl was strong and healthy, and there was nothing for me to worry about.Every now and then, I have this fear eating my insides that I might lose my baby girl too, but whenever I come to the hospital, Doctor Liam always clears my doubts away with the most encouraging words since he's aware of my miscarriage and fearsHe gave me some prescriptions to take, I thanked him, and left. I was dying to go shopping for baby things, but the girls said it would be best if I did so after moving into my new apartment at the Briarwood. I agreed with them too.My plan to move out was already in motion. I had signed the lease, and it was left for me to get a cleaning agency to clean up the place and fix some broken stuff, then I could move in.I stepped out from the hospital's sliding door and flagged down a cab. I was supposed to go home to July's and rest,

THIRTY

ASHELY'S P. O. VTWO WEEKS LATER“So you're telling me the landlord upgraded the flooring, the wiring, even the appliances.” Jackie drawled, earning her an eye roll from Sydney.The elevator pinged and stopped on the sixth floor., I reached into my coat pockets to bring out the keys to my apartment—4C.July was the first to step out of the elevator with a box in hand, every one of them, July, Jackie, Beulah, Gwendie, and Sydney all had a box with them.I had wanted to carry some from the van downstairs, but July feigned a glare my way, and Sydney had launched into a full-on health speech on why I shouldn't be lifting heavy objects.I loved and appreciated how they cared for me, but sometimes it was too much. I'm just nineteen weeks gone, not two days to labour.“Yes,” I answered Jackie's question. She had been surprised that the new landlord had the apartment cleaned and fixed and yet didn't raise the rent.Jackie gasped “Unbelievable”“Maybe he's just being generous” Beulah chipped

THIRTY ONE

KELLAN'S P. O. VI had started growing a stubble.Not intentionally, I just woke up one morning and realized I'd been carrying a beard on my chin. I hadn’t been paying much attention to my appearance lately, and the days were endless. At first, the itch of it annoyed me, but now, it’s become familiar, like a habitThe office air felt too still and suffocating as usual. I needed a breath of fresh air, for a different view besides the one from my office glass wall. My mind was tired of doing the same thing over and over again, but my body hadn't found the motivation to do anything else.I rolled my shoulders, willing the stiffness there to go away.I needed to leave the office—this building in general. The numbers on the screen blurred in my vision. Another sign that I should get out of here to take a breather I tried to focus on the screen, the numbers, the data, but nothing really mattered anymore. I was just living life like I was in a train and the driver had passed my destinatio

THIRTY TWO

ASHLEY'S P.O.VI felt his breath on my neckHotBurning Scorching “Yes,” I whimpered, fisting the sheets by my side. “More.” His weight pressed me down, his fingers teasing the inside of my thigh, sweetly, slowly but not where I needed it. “You like that, love?” Kellan purred into my ears. My back arched and I managed a nod. It was dark in here, so dark I couldn't make out anything except the softness of the sheets, his silhouette hovering over me, and the need pulsing between us.My words came out in a breathless pant “Yes. Please” Even though it was dark, I swear I could see his wicked smile. Kellan leaned down and slanted his lips on mine, kissing me deeply, passionately.His tongue swept across the roof of my mouth and I met his with equal energy. God, I forgot how he kissed me, the way he made everything around us fade, till there was only me, him, us, and the pleasure we give each other. “Kellannn,” I moaned against his mouth. Again, he smiled, and my stomach fluttered.

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