Can A Sarcasm Book Improve Your Wit And Comebacks?

“Bro, it’s not a big deal. I’m just fucking her.” My heart stopped. Kendall’s voice replied, “But man, what would people think if you made her your girl? That’d be crazy work.” “I’m not stupid,” Jalen said flatly. “I’d never make her mine. It’s only sex, nothing more. And honestly? It’s not that good anymore. I was gonna let her down easy before break.” ...... Aria, a plus-size beauty, thought her scholarship and condo arrangements were a dream until she met her roommate, Talia. Rich, spoiled, and instantly cruel, Talia made Aria's life miserable. Talia’s new boyfriend, Jalen, was the campus golden boy. When Aria and Jalen were paired for a project, they clicked in ways neither expected from late night talks to shared secrets and undeniable sexual chemistry. On Halloween night, during an all campus party, Aria sees Talia cheating on Jalen. One emotional night led to an affair that changed everything… until Jalen says some really damaging words to his roommate that were unforgivable and also heard by a once happy but now upset Aria. Disappointed, fed up, and heartbroken, Aria leaves campus and never looks back. TEN YEARS LATER Aria returns for the ten year reunion, confident, stunning, and a self-made CEO. Jalen is still gorgeous… but stuck in a miserable marriage with Talia. She ignores him. Talia tries to humiliate her. Aria wins the room. As she leaves, Jalen kisses her. She lets herself feel it, then slaps him and walks away. THE BUSINESS MERGER Jalen’s cruise line needs Aria’s brand to revamp their image. She agrees, reluctantly. Now they’re forced to work side by side, trapped between old wounds and new sparks. Some love stories never die. But some can burn you twice.

I had a best friend who was sweet as honey but only with her mouth. Behind my back, she was a demon. She stole my boyfriend, the underboss of the Chicago Outfit. Her excuse? She wanted to keep me away from the darkness and the blood, so she'd take the suffering in my place. She pawned her wedding ring and fed her husband some story about a limited edition bag for me. She skimmed from her husband's company accounts and pinned it on my male escort habit. She was pregnant and still wanted thrills. So she went to a full-blown orgy with her husband's uncle and a group of his associates. That's how she ended up hemorrhaging. But somehow it was my fault. I was the one who organized that kind of party, according to her. And her story? She tried to stop me, so I pushed her down and made her lose the baby. In the end, her husband sent me to a cartel hellhole in Mexico to atone for my sins. There, her lover sold me to the red-light district. First came the addiction. Then the streets. I served every man in their outfit, one after another. My body rotted. I died slow, sick, and alone. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the night my best friend miscarried because of her own filthy party.

I’ve always taken people literally. When Dad told me to empty the basin, I asked where he wanted me to pour the water. “On my head,” he snapped. So I did. When Mom told me to do the laundry, I asked whether I should add detergent. She gave a cold laugh. “Sure. Add caramel sauce.” So I poured an entire bottle of caramel sauce into the washing machine. Everyone said I was stupid. But this “stupid” guy took first place in a nationwide academic competition. I earned my school’s only direct-admission spot at one of the country’s top universities. The day the results were announced, Lucas Hale, the school bully, ripped my application apart in front of the entire class. “You can’t even understand sarcasm. Why should someone like you get direct admission? “Last night, I saw you get out of a luxury SUV. Who knows what kind of deal you made with the woman inside?” The whole classroom went quiet. Then everyone started looking at me differently. Lucas stood there with a self-righteous expression. “I’m just speaking up for the rest of the class. Why should we work ourselves to death only to lose out to someone who got in through connections?” I thought about it seriously. Then I took out my phone and called my older sister. “Claire, they said I got my admission spot by sleeping with someone. Is that true?” A few seconds later, I held the phone out to Lucas, whose face had gone pale. “My sister wants to know something.” “What’s your name?” “And your student ID number?”

My mom is terrified of being laughed at by others the most. Whenever the holidays are here, she will keep repeating one sentence to me—"Don't go around embarrassing me." When my relatives gather around and chat with each other, I accidentally knock a fruit platter over. Mom drags me over and slaps me on the spot. At the holiday feast, I grab extra pieces of steak for myself. Mom responds by kicking my chair over. When it's time for the holiday gifts to be distributed, my aunt, Gabriella Hall, has miscalculated the number of children present among the family. So, she has prepared one less gift for the occasion. Mom doesn't hesitate to kick me out of the apartment, leaving me shivering in the cold corridor in just my indoor clothes. The icy winds chill me to the bone. I keep slamming my palms on the front door while screaming and crying my apologies at Mom, and yet she remains unmoved and silent. Instead, she turns to face Aunt Gabriella with an apologetic smile on her face. "I'm really sorry. I didn't raise my daughter well. It's only fair that you ridicule me." What Mom doesn't know is that I get triggered whenever I hear the word "ridicule" thanks to her so-called parenting lessons. Whenever I hear that word, I want nothing more than to hurt myself uncontrollably. So when I hear the word "ridicule" coming out of Mom's mouth through the front door, I turn on my heel quietly and begin making my way toward the bridge next to the neighborhood that's plunged into darkness. The moment I jump from the bridge, the only thought I have is, "Mom, no one will ridicule you because of me this time."

Annalise McDermott gets a free ticket to attend an elite boarding school in Spain after winning an intellectual decathlon quiz. She has been a nerd all her life and had no problem with that. In fact, she felt quite elated to be the most famous person at the bottom of the social radar. Once she's acquainted with her new school, she accidentally gets hurled into the spotlight and finds herself intermingling with the most popular kids in school. Just when she starts thinking things can't get more complicated, her simple life gets thrown into a shadowy haze. She gets employed by three gorgeous girls to help break the heart of triple-timing campus hottie-Dean Richardson- after they discover they've each been dating him.

As soon as my husband sat at the dining table, he couldn't stop himself from talking. The humiliations of my school days had become his favorite entertainment, served up to his drinking buddies like appetizers. "Back then, she got her clothes torn off in the bathroom, beaten so badly she crawled on the ground like a dog, too terrified to make a sound. If it weren’t for my kindness—" That was it. I couldn’t take it anymore. I told him I wanted a divorce. He laughed it off, utterly unbothered. "Seriously? It’s just a joke! That was ages ago. You’re way too uptight—it’s just for a laugh, right?" For a laugh? Was I the only one with a past? Did he think he was untouchable? Maybe I should tell a few embarrassing stories about his precious childhood sweetheart. Fine. If it’s all about “fun,” I hoped his sweetheart found it equally hilarious when her turn came.