Kickass Humour Novels & Stories

"Don’t move an inch, continue fucking her!" I screamed. "Asssshley pleassse!" He pleaded, with tears coming out of his eyes. "What’s that? No! Don’t cry, you are a guy. Don’t you want this?" I asked, glaring at him. Ashley Barbie Gates, a pimp, a sex addict, and queen of the streets, was a lover of hot guys. She had sex with all the hot guys that came her way, and even ruined her mother’s life because of it by having an affair with her stepfather. She was heartbroken when she found her best friend in bed with her boyfriend. She swore to take revenge on all men and always dump them, but she was stuck between a rock and a hard place when she was asked by her father to get married as soon as possible. Xander Aiden Carter, a police officer, found himself entangled with the mafia queen when his sister sold him to her. How will he escape from her clutches? When he is in constant torment by her. How will she let go of her hatred for men and settle down with just one man? And who will it be? Who will melt the heart of the broken queen?

I was barely a young girl when I was sent to him to be trained as an assassin. Marco didn't just turn me into a ruthless killer-he made me a woman. I was his protégé. He was my Master - of my mind, body, and soul. But I wanted more. I wanted to be HIS WOMAN. And how long was he going to deny me?

"I could've told you about the child when we were still married, but I'd rather see you fall on your knees like how I used to beg for the love I deserve." "You lied to everyone, even to your son, all because you wanted revenge? Tell me, who's the ruthless person here, Katalina." -- Cadmus is a respected man, one that holds the world in his hand. To her, he was the best and the best is what Katalina deserves. But when she got heartbroken by the man she adores the most, all hell breaks loose for she was more than a wife left to be discarded. By using Percival, someone who can stand equal to Cadmus. She plans to make the ruthless billionaire regret the pain he caused her.

It was all professional till she discovered that her all-official ruthless CEO boss who sought perfection in everything was a *Stripper!* Billionaire playboy Andre Quinn plays the hearts of women like the king of chess... But in the business world, he makes a pawn of his employees and fires them at the slightest offence. He is unapologetic about his ruthlessness and wears his sex appeal like a duplicate skin. But there will be a pause in his life when his meticulous assistant, Clara discovers his secret which conceals the even darker sides of his life. She has stripped him bare, but will they both lay their vulnerabilities and secrets on one another's feet, starting another arrangement although it might burn them raw?

In a young democratic country previously divided by race with a painful past still deeply embedded in everyone’s minds. Steve Marlone takes on a mission to bring everyone together. His life takes an unexpected turn when he falls for a fellow advocate and activist who is haunted by a horrendous past that makes it impossible for her to see beyond race and accept non racial society. Will their attraction heal old wounds and silence the nightmares or be the very trigger that starts a full blown civil war?

How far can one go for love? Do the words "love conquers all" really prove themselves to be true? Or does it leave no regrets once you give the best you can to avenge the death of the people you love in any way chance presents you? This is a love story of a Mafia man Marco Alfonso and a common girl who had grown to be strong in her own way as life struggles kept provoking her till she reached her limits. How does a simple woman like Skye take the place of the man who had shown her kindness and concern was attacked by someone he trusted and fell ill? If it isn't all for gratitude, could it be because love had started to grow between these two souls? Let us explore the love story of a cold-faced yet warm-hearted Mafia man and a weak girl to a kick-ass woman in the sweet romantic story of... "Ruling the Mafia World".

Three years ago, Camilla had a one-night stand that left her with more than just memories—a son, Carlos, whose father vanished into the night. Now, her carefully constructed life is thrown into chaos when her mother, Elena, introduces her new fiancé, Emilio—the same man Camilla thought she’d never see again. Worse, he has no idea Carlos is his son. Torn between her love for her mother and the undeniable connection she still feels for Emilio, Camilla is pushed into a dilemma. Emilio, caught between his loyalty to Elena and his desire to be with Camilla and Carlos, must make a life-altering decision. As their dark past seems to threaten their future, Camilla must decide—can she risk everything for love, or will the weight of their shared secrets tear them apart forever? Will Camilla and Emilio find their way back to each other, or will they let the tempest rocking their lives hinder them?

"Marry me," Frederick demanded suddenly. Shawty's eyes widened and she stepped away from him in shock. "Have you gone mad?!" "Mad?" He repeated, stepping towards her until he was millimeters away. Until she could feel his breath on her face. "Yes. Perhaps I've gone mad. It's all your fault." "Frederick-" "Why are you so surprised?" he asked, his eyes blazing with a fire she knew very well. "You seduced me. What did you expect Shawty?" **** Shawty had one final task as an assassin before she could retire from her sordid profession - to eliminate Mr. Fredrick Taylor, a notorious billionaire. However, complications arose when the handsome target proved to be too irresistible for her. Despite her conflicting emotions, Shawty accepted the mission, but as she got to know Mr. Taylor, she found herself falling in love with him. Will Shawty be able to complete her mission and retire as planned, or will her feelings for Mr. Taylor get in the way? Will she choose to be the killer or the bride? will she choose duty or her heart? Will she take the shot and end Fredrick's life? or will she risk it all for a chance at love? when desire and passion collide, will Shawty be able to resist the temptation of love? Follow Shawty's journey as she navigates the dangerous world of espionage and learns that sometimes the heart can be the most lethal weapon of all. Wanna find out the answers to your questions? You must surely not miss this. FB Page: Unusual Write Author Page IG : Unusualwrite

“Paige Miller. Stay here for a bit.” He said when my foot was already out the door. I swallowed hard and looked at Darla who just shrugged and closed the door. I was alone with the hot Callan Montgomery Holden. “So, Paige. I thought you were a bartender.” “And I thought you were just a rich asshole kissing girls all day. Never would've peg you for a CEO, boss.” “Hmm. You're funny. I like you.” “Please don't.” I said and he chuckled again. He bit his lower lip, and I could feel myself wanting to hump him right there on his swiveling chair. “You're thinking the same thing I am, right?” “That I should report you to HR for sexual harassment?” “Ha! Good one. But no. I know you want me too. Right here right now. I can feel you getting hot and wet.” “From the way you kissed me, last night? Sorry, but no. Besides, I'm married.” I lied. I realized I was being stupid and reckless when I remembered it was very specific in the job listing that I had to be single with no kids. “Okay, look. I'm not married, but I'm not interested either. I can't afford to be your next plaything. I need this job to save enough money to start my own small business and not work for anyone ever again. So, please. I know you're probably a great guy, but I'm just not interested. So, if there's nothing else you need professionally, good day, Mr. Holden.” “Sure. But they always say that at first. You'll come around.” If I didn’t have a daughter to think of, I'd have made you come in my mouth already you rich spoiled brat!" I wanted to say, but of course absolutely couldn't.

After three years of secret marriage, Reginald Thompson suddenly proposed a divorce to Elizabeth Smith. Elizabeth chuckled, took her share of the property, and left the home of the past three years—using her skills to thrive in the antique world. Some time after the divorce, the former dictator Reginald saw his beautiful ex-wife Elizabeth stunning the audience on television, regretting his past actions. He regretted the divorce and pursued her all over the world, declaring, "My dear Elizabeth, my heart is yours, my life is yours. Come back to me!" Elizabeth Smith's rosy lips parted, "I'm sorry, Reginald!" Later, she encountered the man, Mayo John Brown, who had once saved her life. On the day of their wedding, news arrived. She abandoned the groom John, holding the injured body of Reginald Thompson in sorrow. Until Reginald proposed again, "My beloved Elizabeth, can we get married again?"