Military Stories Funny Novels & Stories

"Oh, yeah, man, you being fifty makes a big difference." If I had my rifle and Frank was in front of me, I could have pulled the trigger. He always found my age as something to joke about, being a couple of years younger than me. Most of the soldiers at the camp had gotten married upon reaching thirty, and me close to being thirty-one made everyone suddenly excited.

“Someone whose brother was in the army told my friend that they only ate canned beans and then she told me.” He shook his head, still smiling. “That’s not true. It’s just one of the stories soldiers tell people to make the army sound dramatic and intense.” “Are you sure?” “I’m positive. Being in the army doesn’t mean you eat only beans. They need proper nutrients too.” I nodded thoughtfully. “Well… that makes sense.” I hesitated. “If you don’t mind me asking… What unit were you in?” “I was in the 1st SFOD-Delta.”

" That got a reaction. Milo and the rest of the gang were momentarily stunned, then erupted into raucous laughter. "Hahahaha!" "No way, did I hear that right? What's this guy on about?" "An army of thousands? He's got to be dreaming!" "I can't even—this is too much, hahaha!" The bald muscle man was doubled over in laughter, tears streaming down his face. He jabbed his pistol toward the handful of soldiers behind Liam, taunting, "Hey, kid, you sure you know how to count? Maybe you should double-check your numbers there."

Kevin chuckled a little when his mom giggled. “Exactly. It felt like a movie,” President Chang agreed with her son while affectionately tapping his hand. “I still feel like this is a movie after hearing about Operation Nightfall. I can’t believe the world is being attacked by soldiers who aren’t from Earth. This is sh*t you see in sci-fi movies or read about in comic books or something, and you know how much I love comic books.” President Chang looked around at her husband, who was giving her a stare that meant he already knew about his wife’s obsession with comics.

"I will let you attend tomorrow's meeting if you promise not to be offended by all the talk about how this is not the place for women. It will be loud and raucous. I suppose a brothel is more humane than some of the things that we do to women here. Most of them are here for torture as prisoners of war or worse. This is a part of our job as well as it is important for us to have information and intelligence of the invading enemy." "There is little left that will shock me. Please rest assured that I will not be offended by soldiers who wish to speak of their adventures and work. It's all in good fun. This is a military installment after all. Most of war is deception anyways and benefit

Keith kept the sharp pointy edge of the knife at the mans stomach. The man was strong and tried to push Keith but Keith didn’t miss a second and stabbed the knife on his shoulder. The man fell down in pain and Keith ran away with his valet. His wife came running to him and cried for help. Keith turned around and laughed loudly and ran away. ************************* “Martina!! I’ve bought the grocery.” Keith called Martina and kept the grocery in the kitchen. “A man came when you were away” Martina said as she checked all the paper bags.

Sometimes I wondered if what I was doing with those men was romantic in nature, or was it just for a show? I didn’t get why they never really got lose themselves with me. One time I listened to Brad telling his friends dating me was like living in a military camp, and my family was the general of the military. I didn’t understand his words at that time, still couldn’t cope with his words.

It was really early. We carried out the breakfast, the ladies all telling stories of their loved ones which were in the war zone. It filled me with such joy, listening the crazy embarrassing stories they surely would kill the ladies for telling them. It was a surreal moment, not wanting to point it out because it would ruin it but how far we had come. Breakfast went fast, going to wash the dishes after.

’ one of the soldiers asked, pointing to the bandage. Jake grinned, his eyes sparkling with pride. ‘Oh, it’s nothing serious. Just a little mishap during training yesterday,’ he replied, trying to downplay his injury. Another soldier, Mike, leaned in with a mischievous glint in his eyes. ‘Come on, spill the beans, Jake. I heard you had a pretty eventful day. What really happened?’ The others gathered around, eager to hear Jake’s tale. He couldn’t resist sharing the exciting encounter he had experienced the previous day. ‘Well, you guys won’t believe it, but I had a run-in with General Westwood himself,’ he exclaimed.

I shouted at anyone who could hear me. Mila was a few feet away from me, and I ran towards her. "I’m okay." she said, looking at me up and down to make sure I wasn’t injured either. "Even during a fucking war, you can’t keep your eyes from me, can you?" I joked, which earned me an eyeroll. Friendly soldiers were walking out of the smoke disoriented before getting shot in the back. It was no time for fucking jokes. "I’m going in." I told Mila, who shook her head.