MasukAngelica
I press my palms against a clothed, hard chest. The fabric is soft to the touch and…wet, reeking of alcohol. I immediately know who this chest belongs to—and I shouldn’t be touching it. So I take a step back, withdrawing my hand as though instead of wet, the fabric burns me. But the second I do, long, thick, and manly fingers wrap around both my wrists, pulling me flush against him, my palms pressed there again, feeling the steady thud beneath it. I shut my eyes and try to pull away, but he doesn’t let me, tightening his hold around my wrists instead. However, as if sensing my powerlessness against him, knowing I’m too weak to keep fighting, he releases his hold on me, and I finally peel my eyes open, only to sink into further confusion. Instead of a clothed chest, my palms now press against bare skin, warm and solid. Shock frizzles through me, and I’m too scared to move, too scared to breathe, too scared to tear my eyes from the hard body. But I do; not because I’ve overcome my fear, but because he’s both familiar and unfamiliar. I trail my gaze upward, from his chest to his neck, to his… There’s no face. It’s just…nothing. I yell at the top of my lungs but the sound is muffled, backing away as I fall on my bum so hard pain shoots up my spine. I rise from my sleep with a jolt, my heart beating erratically underneath my chest, beads of sweat coating my forehead and my pink pajama set damp despite the air conditioner. My eyes roam around my surroundings, seemingly calming my erratic heart as my brain registers I’m in the safety of my bedroom and not in that unfamiliar room from three months ago. A sigh of relief escapes my lips and I lift my hand to my head to wipe off the sweat lodged there. Though my chest keeps pounding. That night is a myth. Waking up in the large suite alone— my underwear intact but my dress sprawled on the ground, a pounding headache, with no recollection of how I got there, the face of the man I was with or what happened to me—haunted not only my thoughts but my dreams too. Especially my dreams, since it was the only place that felt truly mine, where I was free and could be anything I wanted. The morning after, I cried until my throat burned, terrified of what might have happened to me. I regretted ever setting my foot out of the house at all that night, at trusting the woman who ended up drugging me, and at not letting Joey go in with me. It was a miscalculation on my part. I thought I’d go in, have a drink or two and leave, but I never considered unforeseen circumstances. I’d been so angry at myself I nearly tore my list, but I didn’t, instead I told myself I’d abort mission. Days turned into weeks, and the fear dulled into something quieter, something I refused to name. I let myself believe I’d suffered worse at the hands of Nicolas to dwell on that one experience. Until recently, I dusted off my journal, letting my eyes roam over the scribbled words, reacquainting myself with them after surviving yet another bout of beatings from Nicolas all because he was in a bad mood. I ticked off the only item I knew I completed for certain. DRINK ALCOHOL. And since I ticked it off, I stopped having nightmares of that night. That is until last night. Purely triggered by none other than Marciano D’amato. With a sigh, I place my hand over my chest, feeling the beat of my heart slow down. Only for it to pick up again at the sound of a heavy knock on the door. “Coming,” I yell out startled, rushing to my feet instantly while wondering who was at the door and why. I swing the mahogany door open to reveal the housekeeper, Esmeralda. Her face is set in a slight frown; her light brows knitted together with a little scrunch to her nose. “Good morning. Mr. Hearst wants you down for breakfast,” she announces. If she weren’t always indifferent when Nicolas hit me, I might’ve mistaken the look in her eyes for pity. My stomach tightens, blood rushing to my temple as her words register. I can only nod. “He’ll be back from his workout soon, so you better hurry.” I close my door as she leaves, running to my closet to change out of my pajamas, after which I head downstairs without even bothering to brush my teeth. None of the family members are down when I arrive at the dining table, so I go to the kitchen to help out with breakfast. Everyone is seated at the dining table twenty minutes later, and I wish I brushed my teeth. Nicolas is at the head of the table, fully dressed in a black suit and black dress shirt; something he never does. Sarah sits to the left of him in a flowery dress and Nadine to his right. Nicolas Jr. Junior, as everyone calls him, is right beside his mother, all dressed for school, while I’m sitting on a chair with an empty one between Nadine and I as if to show that though we’re sisters, we’re not the same. I’m the child born out of infidelity and she’s the child born out of love. Why am I even here? I meet Nicolas’s eyes instantly, and as if he read my thought, he clears his throat and presses his palms together. “Something tragic happened at the party last night,” he announces and pauses to let his words land. Sarah sucks in an exaggerated breath, a hand on her chest, Nadine and her brother both turn to Nicolas, identical looks of indifference on their faces. “Unfortunately, Celia D’amato was shot during the gun fight and she died on the way to the hospital.” My breath hitches in my throat, my chest tightening. Celia was shot? No wonder Nicolas didn’t come home with us, he stayed back at the mansion. “What?” “Oh poor woman.” I don’t dare say a word because I know my input is not needed. I don’t even know why I’m here listening to this. “Do they know who did it?” Sarah asks, her eyes watery. Nicolas shakes his head. “And that’s why they’re at their wits end,” he chuckles darkly, lodging his knife into the steak he insists on having for breakfast every morning. “They don’t trust anyone right now, but their head must take a wife. So they came to me.” He plops a piece of steak into his mouth, chewing. He’s the only one eating. Silence stretches thinly around the entire room. His insinuation hovers above our heads, every eye trained on him, waiting eagerly to know where this is going. Nicolas, dramatic as ever, drops his fork and knife on his plate, and finally looks up. His eyes land on Nadine. “I chose you as his wife.” The element of surprise only lasts for a second before Nadine kicks back her chair as she stands, shaking her head. “What? How could you do that?” She yells, staring down at her father. “Nadine—” “No!” she declares firmly, folding her arms. “What?” “You heard me, father. I said no! I refuse to marry that man,” she cries out. “How dare you?” “No, father, how dare you?” Nicolas’s frown is immediate. “Nadine,” Sarah calls out warily, but Nadine doesn’t respond to her. “You know better than me what people call that man; A beast! His reputation is the worst. People say he killed his wife and child, so how do you expect me to marry a man like that?” She yells, then her eyes land on me. “Especially when you have this freak here!” She points a finger at me. I bite my lower lip so tight I draw blood, praying Nicolas wouldn’t buy the idea. But who am I kidding? I’ve always been a spare part for this family. A punching bag if they ever need one. “You could’ve chosen her! So why me? Why chose me to suffer a loveless marriage?” Her eyes are hateful and trained on me, then she turns back to her father. “So no. I’m not and I will never marry that demon!” The room falls into silence again, the only sound that can be heard being that of Nadine’s rushed breaths. Nicolas’s eyes slide to me again, and this time, they linger. My stomach clenches. No, this can’t be happening. A cold wave creeps up my spine as something settles deep in my chest—heavy and inevitable. “It is settled then,” he says, eyes narrowing. “You will marry into the D’amato family.”Angelica The sound of my heart shattering is not as loud as I always thought it would be. It’s silent, but I feel each piece falling apart as disappointment and embarrassment flood through my entire body.I’m still straddling him. My palms are on his warm chest, and I can feel his heart beneath, beating effortlessly.“Okay,” I mutter with my head hung, but it comes out as a whisper as I try to climb off his body. His fingers immediately grip my shirt tight, halting my movement. I feel the urge to lift my eyes to his face, to see the expression or emotion there. Yet I don’t, because I’m scared of what I’ll see there. It also doesn’t help that the grip only lasts three seconds before he guides me to the bed.He doesn’t look back at me when he gets up, or even when he walks away into the bathroom. While I sit on his side of the bed, staring at the closed door and wondering what went wrong. He’d been the one to kiss me, so why would he stop out of the blue? I should be angry, but as
Angelica I can’t concentrate.I’ve been going back and forth between the same two pages over the past hour now, and yet I can’t get Marciano’s angry voice out of my head. I also can’t wrap my head around why he’d been so angry.‘You’re lucky you didn’t go there to meet him, Angelica. Also very fucking lucky you didn’t try to—’He’d said. What was he going to say? That I didn’t try to do what?I close my study book, burying my head in my hands.Marciano is hard to figure out. I’ve known this, but I’ve also never been left so confused by him before.He was so angry yet he pressed into me, and held me like I belong against him.‘Don’t make me keep you locked up here again. I’m not a very patient man.’ He meant that. And that’s what scares me.Because if he decides to keep me locked up like he said, my escape from this life and this marriage might be a little more difficult.I shake my head.That can’t happen. I won’t let it. I don’t care what I have to do, but I won’t go back to living
Angelica “What’s with the bag?” It doesn’t immediately register that his hand is on my waist until I feel a tight squeeze urging me to respond.But I can’t. My heart is somewhere in my throat because I’ve suddenly forgotten how to speak.Marciano glowers at me, clenching his jaw. He’s furious. My grip around my bag hardens and I swallow.His gaze sweeps over the street before settling on me again. If it’s possible, he looks angrier. Scarier.“Why are you alone? Where’s Gypsy?”I can’t avoid pressing my lips together. Of all the things I thought would happen today, this one never crossed my mind.Why is he here? He said he’d be home late so I thought he was traveling. Why is he here of all places?He raises his second brow, waiting expectantly for an answer.My heart is pounding so loudly that my head hurts. I have to think of something quick.“I-I got lost…?” I respond, but it comes out more as a suggestion than a statement. Marciano moves back a little, though his hand still sit
Angelica I pace back and forth in the room so much the carpet should have grooves in it now.Marciano left almost forty minutes ago, but I’ve been stuck on the same thought.Weighing my options, I don’t have as many restrictions as I did before, but now there’s a higher risk of them figuring out what I’m doing.Gypsy especially.He’s indeed more protective of me than Ky is because he goes everywhere with me, but I just can’t shake the feeling that he’ll be the first to rat me out. I pause, my eyes finding Marciano’s card on the bed. “What if I tell him I’m going shopping?” I mutter. It makes sense because Marciano’s card will prove it’s totally alright, but there are barely any boutiques or shopping malls there, plus Gypsy wouldn’t let me go shopping alone.I let out a breath, already feeling defeated.“I’ll figure something out,” I say to encourage myself, but deep down I don’t think this will work. Still, I hop into the shower for a quick wash, and afterwards I get dressed in a p
Angelica I spring to my feet immediately, the chair scraping against the ground as I push it back, throwing my napkin on the chair.“Excuse me.” Without waiting for a response, I turn around, marching out of the room, even with my name echoing behind me. I don’t stop, even when I hear the sound of his chair moving backwards, and I don’t wait when I hear him clear his throat. I walk straight out, only to bump into our waiter.He steadies me with both arms on my shoulders, eyes wide as he stares down. I step away from him with a small nod.“Restroom,” I manage to force out, one hand over my mouth, the other on my stomach. The waiter points toward the restroom, his brows still furrowed in confusion, and I practically sprint there.My vision is blurry as I grip the first thing my hands find to steady myself. Only when I blink through the tears do I realize it’s the wash basin.Bile rises to my throat, and I grip the sink until my fingers ache.Then I hear it.“Angelica~” In a sing-son
Angelica As I spray a sealing spray on my face, I realize that ever since Marciano told me we’d go out for dinner tonight, I didn’t worry once about meeting a crowd. Whenever Nicolas would tell me I had to come with the rest of the family, I’d always be left feeling anxious and nauseous. And it would never go away until after the event was done and I was back home. I dreaded hearing I had to leave the house.Tonight, somehow, it doesn’t feel the same.I feel the immediate tightening of my face as the spray activates, holding my makeup still. I smile at my reflection.I’m no makeup professional, but I think I did a decent job even though one of my winged liner is flying in a higher direction than the other. As someone who hasn’t practiced in a long while due to one situation or the other, I give myself some credit.With my middle finger, I wipe the edges of my lips to ensure my lip gloss is right on track without spillage. Then I let out a breath as I take a step back to see my full
Angelica Marciano turns around, but he does it so nonchalantly like it’s the last thing he wants to do right now. I turn around too, putting my back to him as I quickly throw the paper into my laundry basket, then I grab the first thing that catches my eyes to cover myself with.It’s a flimsy, ba
Angelica *present day*“Fix that pretty face of yours!” Nicolas grabs my face, his thumb and index fingers digging into my cheek, hard enough to make me wince.“God forbid the D’amatos think it’s not as perfect as everyone says it is,” he hisses, then releases my face from his grip, his eyes roam
AngelicaBarely anyone is here when the bouncer leads me in, not after biting his lower lip and wiggling one brow at me suggestively. It should've been the first red flag because while I hoped for not much of a crowd, this kind of empty feels... wrong.I tell myself it's not an issue and adjust my
Angelica *three months ago* The sound of a car engine revs loudly in the distance. I can already guess it's one of those fast cars I've come to associate with the residents of Brown Hill. My head whips toward my open window, trying to catch a glimpse. I don't. Instead, I notice how dark







