Funny Backhanded Compliments Novels & Stories

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

A young guy keeps getting into trouble in very funny and unfortunate ways. He wrecked havocs on people too, mistakenly. He hallucinated and had great fantasies about people to brighten up his hearers. Afterwards, he came back to his mundane reality.

Kiara Tennyson. It has always been her dream to go to the US. After her parent's death, an opportunity presents itself when she gets a chance to go there as an exchange student. She is funny, crazy, very loving, and has read too many books to know that she will find new friends, get into a fight on the first day of school with the queen bee and later teach her a lesson, and maybe find love. Reed Scott. Your typical cliche bad boy. His first love broke his heart causing him to change from loving to becoming cold. What do you think will happen when a bubbly and crazy person comes barging into his life and tries to change his cold demeanour? Why don't you read and find out? Join Kiara and be mistaken for a dog sitter, get into fights, prank the queen bee, fall on your butt in front of your new best friend, prank the whole school, take the bad boy shopping and most importantly find love abroad.

Ugly, disguising, repulsing and plain were only a few 'compliments' Adana was accustomed to. Finally deciding she had had enough, she works hard to get the perfect revenge body she wanted and the table seemed to have flipped on her past enemies. The Richard twins. The perfect pair of polar opposite, move to Lakeland falls after escaping a possible death threat. What happens when they both seem pulled towards the melanin goddess in form of Adana Spindly.

David meet Daniele while graduating from the seminary. He had long secretly admired Danielle, his favourite. Many women tried to entice David and made up amazing stories to keep his attention. Not because everyone likes her, but rather because she is funny, straightforward, gorgeous, and intelligent. Daniele has become everyone's favorite. Daniele has always fared extraordinarily well on tests and in class evaluations. She receives bullying from both her male and female young peers as a result of her decision to forgo makeup in favor of a comedic appearance. Daniele trained as a psychiatrist and a nun. Her superiors support her, and her friends envy her. She has been the target of plotting because she maintains her purity for the Lord while remaining untouched by human behavior and viewpoints. As a born-again Christian believer, Daniele found unforeseen challenges that led her to meet David. However, she has not yet tasted genuine love. She evolved into an emancipated lady and a modernized nun, which affected her siblings. David appeals to Daniele and she falls in love with him for these reasons. Many women claim for David but he usually denied. Daniele learns how to love David with all of her heart. David admitted that Daniele was his fate. Unexpectedly, the marriage minister offers them the quick union he had suggested. It matches David because he already has financial issues and his mother has been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. As they are ready to go back home, they both decided to have children. They go on a secret trip deciding to have children abroad. Daniele suffered when all of her children disappeared, and David had to be following the laws. She resumes her profession as well as becomes a church worker until her children return safe and sound.  

I'm a CEO. Funny things keep happening around me after I meet a weird woman.

Sarai was an orphan omega slave. She was facing bullying and mistreatment from her park members.  At first, she didn't understand why. Only because she was helped by a mysterious person to learn from books? Or was it about her funny dreams of becoming the first she-beta in history? Was her dreams so funny after all?  As if that's not enough, she then got rejected on her 18th birthday by her fated mate, Alpha Damon. What role could Damon play in her journey of becoming a she-beta?  Could they confront their differences and come together to make her aspirations a reality?

After a century of wandering and sealed away in seclusion, I came home to the Ashveil Order. The one who received me was the youngest apprentice of the current generation. Taking me for a fresh recruit, he put me through a so-called pre-training inspection and helped himself to my travel pack. "You're carrying this many rare reagents and relics? For someone just starting out, that's nothing but a burden. I'll go to the trouble of taking some off your hands." "Why do you have so many elixirs and warding sigils? Did you rob someone? That's dangerous. I'll keep them safe for you, so no one comes hunting you for them." Then he laid a hand on my soul-bound blade and said, "This sword carries far too much killing edge. It clashes with your gift and will tear at your soul if you wield it. Lucky for you, it suits mine perfectly. I'll take care of it for you." I'd had enough. I backhanded him across the face. Did he have any idea that the Ashveil in Ashveil Order came from me—Rowan Ashveil?

After waking up from a car accident, I realize that I've lost some of my memories. My wife, Samantha Ross, embraces me immediately and says in a choked-up tone, "The doctor said that you've hurt your manhood in the accident. You… might not be able to perform in the bedroom anymore." My father-in-law, Edmund Ross, sighs heavily as well. He tells me that even if I can't get Samantha pregnant anymore, I will always be the only son-in-law who's married into the Ross family. Everyone compliments me on marrying into a wonderful family. After all, Samantha refuses to abandon me, and Edmund completely understands my situation. But I know for a fact that my kidneys aren't busted at all. Also, I already had a son with Samantha a long time ago. The thing is, where on earth is that child now?