Funny Mom Jokes Dirty Novels & Stories

I stared at my stepfather with the intense feeling going under my wet soaked undies . “ you are so wet for daddy you little slut “ he whispered biting softly at my ear lobe . I swallowed the unknown lump on my throat and looked helplessly at my step father and the words that I had been dying to say slipped out of my mouth . “ fuck me daddy , fuck me like a dirty little slut “

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

Brianna Quinn's life has been lonely untill she adopts 4 kids from the streets, becomes their mom giving them a better life. Throw in a handsome billionaire who takes a liking in the mom and her kids leading to a beautiful romance that touches the heart. Find out how Brianna's relationship with her kids grow. Everyone wants a beautiful family. Find out how humanity still exists in the life we live today. And a beautiful romance between two lonely people who become proud parents of 4 if not more😊

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

My mother is hospitalized due to a terminal illness. She's in urgent need of a kidney transplant to save her life. I'm the only one who can perform the surgery, but I give the kidney to a stranger. My father and husband get on their knees before me on the day of the surgery. They beg me to save my mother. However, I shrug and say, "I can't do anything about this. A life is a life, regardless of who the person is. This is what she gets for coming late—death is waiting for her."

If you’re filthy minded, step inside the doors of Dirty Angels and order a drink. Dirty Angels is a cocktail bar where desire, power, and bad decisions collide. Everyone who walks through its doors is hiding something, and everyone wants something they shouldn’t. The story unfolds through rotating points of view, each character given five chapters at a time to reveal the dirty business they’re involved in. Mafia deals. Billionaire secrets. Bad boys with dangerous appetites. Obsessions that refuse to stay buried. Each arc can be read on its own, but together they weave into a larger, darker story as the full truth behind Dirty Angels slowly comes into focus. At the centre are Marisol and Ethan, locked in a volatile enemies-to-lovers dynamic neither of them is willing to name. Around them orbit lovers, rivals, and predators: a mafia ex who won’t let go, a billionaire with too much power, a shark lawyer who knows exactly where the bodies are buried, and a found family bound together by loyalty, desire, and shared secrets. Dirty Angels attracts those who crave the forbidden. Boundaries blur. Power shifts hands. Desire takes many forms, and not everyone is looking for love. Some will find it anyway. Others will burn everything down on the way. Tropes & Themes: Enemies to lovers • MM • MMF • FF • Power dynamics • Daddy energy • Age gap (all adults) • Step-relations (adults) • BDSM themes • Obsession • Found family • Dark desire

Everyone’s turning she had witnessed came with its surprise; Camila had passed out, and Gideon had released a howl that made the pack deaf for some minutes, but finding out she was a bastard on the night of her turning was the least surprise she was expecting. Asides from the humiliation that came with it, it meant she wasn't going to be alpha, not in Craw Pack at least. Then the surprises didn't stop as she watched the man she called Father slay her mum like she wasn't Luna, she looked him straight into his eyes while he sentenced her to a lifetime of bondage. The Wells family were fighters, and so she fought for her freedom but ended up as a slave in another pack, hiding her identity to save her life. The white wolves to whom she belonged were thought to be weak, but Isha was ready to change that narrative, even if it meant getting her white dirty. From betraying the one who learned to love her, to taking the lives of the closest persons to her, she avenged her mum's death, built an army, and got everything she wanted, except the trust of the Alpha who meant the world to her. They say you can't just have anything you want, but Isha was convinced she was born to break rules, but she underestimated who was standing on the other end of the line; Holly Smearson was not the girl to cross, not with an Alpha-in-line by her side. Isha would soon understand why the love of her life had wanted Holly by his side in the beginning. Too many lies, too many ties, a white wolf, insides too dirty.

⚠️ WARNING: This book will ruin you for vanilla sex. Side effects include spontaneous wetness, missed deadlines, "one more chapter" syndrome at 3 AM, and explaining to your partner why you suddenly have ideas. Reader discretion advised. Vibrator recommended. For readers 18+ who like their fantasies FILTHY and their boundaries FLEXIBLE. She didn't know she needed five frat brothers until her boyfriend offered her up as initiation. She didn't know she craved her stepdad's best friends until they caught her skinny dipping. She didn't know she was a fertility goddess until the clinic offered natural insemination. Now she knows. DIRTY DREAMS is a scorching collection of no-holds-barred erotica for women who want MORE. More men. More holes filled. More loads taken. More of the fantasies you've only whispered about in the dark. Inside you'll find: → Gangbangs that leave her dripping and delirious → Taboo encounters with men who should be off-limits → CNC scenarios that blur every line you thought you had → Breeding rituals designed to fill her up and knock her up → Good girls corrupted, wives shared, and innocence absolutely wrecked From fraternity basements to fertility clinics, from camping grounds to cult ceremonies, these stories don't tease – they deliver. Every hole. Every load. Every filthy fantasy you've been too ashamed to Google. This is not your mother's romance novel. This is the book you hide on your Kindle. This is the book you read with one hand. This is the book that finally scratches that itch. Contains: gangbangs, reverse harem, dubcon, breeding, taboo relationships, CNC (consensual non-consent), age gaps, degradation, cum play, and absolutely zero apologies. All characters are 18+. All scenarios are fiction. All orgasms are guaranteed.

Reena’s life was simple… until one accident changed everything. A violent crash, a journey through darkness, and when she opens her eyes— Reena finds herself inside the novel she was reading all night. The novel’s name was— “The Dirty Mafia.” But the biggest truth is— She is not the heroine. She is not even a minor character. Reena has become the villainess. A villainess whose death is written in the most brutal way— and that death belongs to the hands of the mafia king, a man with no mercy in his heart. Now Reena knows everything. She knows the ending that awaits her. Betrayal. Blood. And a death that spares no one. The story is no longer fiction— It has become her reality. Now she has only one choice: Rewrite her fate. But when the mafia king is the most dangerous man alive, and the one who is supposed to save her is the same man who came to kill her— What can Reena do? Will she change her story, or will the same horrific ending finally consume her?

Owen Dawson is one of Eastwood’s most eligible bachelors. He could have any woman he wants, but when it comes to settling down, he only has eyes for Charlie Williams, and he blew his chance with her years ago. While Owen is busy trying to convince everyone—and himself—that the playboy life is for him, Charlie is trying to put her life back together.After discovering her fiancé was cheating on her, Charlie packs her bags, leaves her fancy New York job, and goes back to the one place she never thought she’d return to: home. Determined to start over and stay far, far away from men, the last thing Charlie needs in her life is her first love, Owen…and the old feelings that come rushing back the moment she lays eyes on him.While Charlie swears to avoid romance of any kind, Owen is willing to do whatever it takes to prove he’s a changed man and win Charlie back…even if it means fighting dirty.