Funny Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

Her name was Cathedra. Leave her last name blank, if you will. Where normal people would read, "And they lived happily ever after," at the end of every fairy tale story, she could see something else. Three different things. Three words: Lies, lies, lies. A picture that moves. And a plea: Please tell them the truth. All her life she dedicated herself to becoming a writer and telling the world what was being shown in that moving picture. To expose the lies in the fairy tales everyone in the world has come to know. No one believed her. No one ever did. She was branded as a liar, a freak with too much imagination, and an orphan who only told tall tales to get attention. She was shunned away by society. Loveless. Friendless. As she wrote "The End" to her novels that contained all she knew about the truth inside the fairy tale novels she wrote, she also decided to end her pathetic life and be free from all the burdens she had to bear alone. Instead of dying, she found herself blessed with a second life inside the fairy tale novels she wrote, and living the life she wished she had with the characters she considered as the only friends she had in the world she left behind. Cathedra was happy until she realized that an ominous presence lurks within her stories. One that wanted to kill her to silence the only one who knew the truth.

The night before our wedding anniversary party, my husband—Harvey Clarke—receives constant calls from his first love, Cassie Moss. He responds by holding me closer, and I ask, "Aren't you going to pick up? What if it's urgent?" He firmly shakes his head and says he has already moved on. But when he receives news of her at the party, he breaks down right there and then, oblivious to the room of staring guests. When he tries to leave, I stop him in a panic, but he turns to me with a pure look of disgust. "Cassie's dead. Happy now?" The words hit me like a lightning bolt.

My world shattered when I discovered my husband Ryan's infidelity with my best friend. The pain and betrayal I felt were suffocating. Our five-year marriage, once a fairy tale, had been a facade. Behind closed doors, Ryan's charming smile hid a web of deceit and infidelity. I was blindsided, left to pick up the pieces of my broken heart. That's when Ethan, Ryan's billionaire brother, entered my life. His piercing eyes and charming smile made me feel safe, like I could trust him with my deepest secrets. Ethan was everything Ryan wasn't - honest, loyal, and true.

Olivia Harmon's marriage was not ideal. Her husband cheated on her at the time she needed him most. Despite his effort to pay for his mistakes, Olivia never really moved on from her heartbreak. She couldn't understand why someone whom she trusted most would be the one person who betrayed her. And then she met Roman. Blue eyes, full of charms, a smile that could brighten up her darkest nights, funny, and a face that made any woman turned their heads. Their love affair was fervent, refreshing, passionate, romantic, and brief. It was over as soon as it began until they meet again two years later in unexpected circumstances. Lies. Deceit. Guilt. Passion. Love. Infatuation. Olivia found herself in a tug-of-war with herself. Tangled in the complexity of her marriage and her new love. She soon discovered she was not the only one with secrets, leading them to an inevitable doom.

What happens when a billionaire CEO goes to college? Faith is about to find out. Utterly and completely broke, Faith is forced to work three different jobs to support herself through college. Unlike her counterparts, Faith failed to get the good fortune of being born into a rich family. God's attempt to make it up to her must have been giving her a super sharp brain which is the only reason why she could attend the prestigious Barbell University on a half scholarship. But, with the remaining half of her tuition going into $35,000, Faith is forced to slave away night and day at her part-time jobs while simultaneously attending classes, completing assignments, taking tests and writing exams. Faith would do anything--literally anything, to get some respite, including taking on the job of tutoring a famously arrogant, former-dropout, self-made billionaire CEO of a tech company for a tidy sum. Devlin has returned to college after five years to get the certificate he desperately needs to close an important business deal. Weighed down by memories of the past, Devlin finds himself struggling to move ahead. Can Faith teach this arrogant CEO something more than Calculus and Algebra? Will he be able to let go of the past and reach for something new?

I was separated from my family at a young age and was adopted by my adoptive parents, who treated me very well. The day I turned eighteen and became an adult, my biological parents called me and begged me to meet them. Even though I had not seen them for years, I decided to fly to the city where they lived for a meetup. On the day I arrived, I shopped for gifts to give them as a gesture of goodwill, all while waiting for my biological brother to come and pick me up. When I finally picked up the gifts, a young woman decided to take them for herself. “I want the smoking pipe, the tie, and the necklace she’s holding!” She signaled to the shop assistant with a quirk of her lips, and the latter snatched the gift boxes from me. “Hey, I saw them first!” I was furious, but she looked me up and down with a sneer. “All these items are from the most expensive brands in the store. They cost hundreds of thousands of dollars. Can a penniless loser like you afford them? “I am the daughter of the Ferrero family. My older brother is the heir of the Roccia Gang, the city's most powerful gang. Over here, no one dares fight me over things I’ve set my eyes on.” ‘Ferrero? Isn’t that my biological family?’ I thought. As it turned out, she was the girl my parents had adopted after they lost me. I raised an eyebrow and called my older brother, who was coming to pick me up. “Hey, your adopted sister snatched the gifts I bought for you all. What’re you going to do about it?”

Whispers in the underworld mentioned that Jason Marino, heir to the Family with its hands in the cross-continental arms trade, supposedly loved women with slim waists. Since his recent return to the country, his eyes had landed on Sonia Stewart—sworn sister to my fiancé, Andy Black. When Andy found out, he disappeared for three whole days. I finally tracked him down in the Family's club, only to overhear a conversation that shattered my world. "I'm not just going to stand by and watch Sonia marry that playboy Jason," Andy was telling his lieutenant. "On the wedding day, you need to swap Sonia's wedding car with Leona's. No one must find out!" His lieutenant thumped his chest, swearing, "No problem, boss! I'll get it done. But... What about your fiancee, Leona?" Andy let out a confident laugh, as if he were in control of everything. "I'm the Don's hand-picked Consigliere. Jason knows Leona belongs to me, so he won't lay a finger on her. Once I've slept with Sonia, he'll have to give up on her. After that, we'll just send someone to pick Leona up. She won't suspect a thing. Instead, she'll be scared and trembling… Pathetic but adorable nonetheless. She'll come running right back to my arms!" Every word was like a bullet leaving holes in my heart, every tone tearing it apart. I stumbled away as fast as I could, praying they wouldn't hear the sound of my heart breaking. When Andy tried to pick me up according to his plan later on, he broke down.

He walks over to meet me caressing my face and holds my gaze. "I vow to wipe every single Mendova that includes you. I'll make sure I kill you with my bare hands if you dare defy me, so when your day comes, your will to live belongs to me, Hannah Victoria, till death do us part. So, die for me." ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Hannah Victoria, the only child of Mason Mendova, lives with her relatives after the death of her father. She resides with Ephraim Mendova, her uncle, his wife, Beatrice Mendova, and his three children. Lilly, Christian and James. She is an assassin trained to eliminate the Mendova's opponents. Zachary Montiquez is a self made billionaire. Due to the amount of time he spends on his company, every woman that dates him accuses him of not giving them enough time. They cheat on him and end up blaming Zachary. His parents want him to settle down but he couldn't care less. Hannah wants out of the Mendova's family but she's given a task to pick one man out of Seven candidate to marry. Likely, all the men given to her hates her so she'll have to pick the one she can handle. Fate brings Zachary and Hannah together on Lilly's birthday party. Although, they didn't start off good but Hannah ends up proposing to him since he's a candidate of the men chosen and he accepts. The two bound together by hatred concludes on living a horrid marriage of absolute chaos. But soon enough, their Hatred for one another would create a bond that surpass the thorn of disdain.

Marco Gabriel is the cold-hearted and arrogant CEO of Marc's Lux company, a man who is tormented by his past. When he hires Patricia as his personal secretary, he sees her as a sweet, innocent girl who is no threat to him or his organization. But little does he know that she is in fact a survivor- a ruthless, dark-hearted agent who will do anything to get revenge. Patricia may well be able to seduce her way to his heart but will the cost be too great ? The Seducing art of Patricia is a gripping and a compulsive thriller that will keep you up reading half the night and stay with you long after the final page is turned.

I woke up, and I was 28 again. I had twin heirs, and my husband was Santino, Veridia's most feared Mafia Don. He sat at the head of the Commission of the Five Families. His sharp profile was a fixture on the cover of the underworld's most exclusive magazine for several consecutive issues. Even the oldest Valerian families were lining up to offer him their daughters. All the women in Altoria envied my good fortune. But the first thing I did after waking up was pick up the divorce papers, the ink still fresh, and handed them to his childhood sweetheart, Jessy. "My lawyer will handle the divorce. The properties and assets are yours. Santino is yours. The children are yours, too." Sitting across from me, Jessy couldn't believe it, her eyes wide with shock. "Are you crazy, Alessia? Is this some kind of trick?" "How could the woman who has been Donna for six years give it all up so easily?" I lowered my gaze, my tone calm. "Since they all prefer you, I figured it was time to step aside." "Just have Santino sign it and press his signet ring into the wax seal." "Once the divorce is final, I'll leave Veridia for good." This time, I would not make the same mistake. I would never again be a Donna in name only.