Random Thoughts Funny Novels & Stories

“We didn’t mean anything by it.” “I know.” I do know. That’s the scary part. Because most people don’t wake up planning to make somebody feel small. They just… don’t think. They chase a laugh. They want their friends to think they’re funny. They never stop to wonder how many little jokes it takes before someone starts believing them. I know because I did exactly that. “You guys play football?” Three confused nods. “You know what happens if somebody misses an assignment?” “We run.” “What happens if somebody blows a coverage?”

Zach, do you think I'm going crazy? At that moment, Zach's voice rang out, "If you're that miserable, then you should move out."

Heavy with shit we weren’t saying. I cleared my throat. “Alright. That’s enough depressing hospital talk. You know what would really make my day better?” He glanced at me, brows raised. “A really dumb joke.” Andrew blinked. Then tilted his head a little, lips twitching like he was fighting a smile. “A dumb joke?” I nodded, lips curving around the cigarette still hanging from my mouth. “Come on. Hit me.” He gave me a look—half skeptical, half amused. “Fine. What do you call a sad strawberry?”

laughing. Big, stupid, unbothered laughs, like something out of a cheesy toothpaste commercial. My stomach flips, and my mind starts spinning again, unhelpfully loud. Did he sleep with her too? Maybe Lottie’s the girlfriend, and I was a random woman and didn’t even know it. God. Maybe I’m the joke. The thoughts come too fast. They pile up, heavier and messier with each second. I try to ignore it, keep typing nonsense on my screen like I’m functional, but it’s no use. My brain’s gone rogue.

I opened my mouth to speak, deciding to just dive in and not hold back. "Ryan, I think we need to ta—" "I was just wondering if you—" We both stopped dead, noticing we had started talking at the exact same moment. We looked at each other and a laugh escaped both of us this time, it wasn't forced or nervous; it was a pure moment of mutual awkwardness. "See?" I joked, still giggling. "Great minds, right?" "Yeah, great minds think exactly alike, apparently," he said, shaking his head. "Okay, you first, you sound like you have something important to say."

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

Too vivid to forget. A thought hit me. A crazy thought.

I ѕhооk mу hеаd іn a vain аttеmрt to ѕnар myself оut of thinking anymore inappropriate thоughtѕ. Yеаh, like thаt was really gоіng tо hеlр. “Hmm yeah, I dоn’t wаnt to gо tо school wіth a trout роut.” There wеrе еnоugh of thоѕе аlrеаdу. Wе bоth lаughеd together, thоugh mіnе wаѕ ѕlіghtlу mоrе awkward.

"I'm Kernan..... erm.. I mean Keenan. my name is Keenan. " "I'm Nivea but you can call me Ni for short." she said as she blushed. She's so perfect. All the way from her flowing curly brown hair all the way down her curvy body. I wonder if she's a smart as she looks. We ended up talking for hours on end and kept buying her drinks that she slowly sipped on. I found out her favorite things: Favorite pass time: watching movies on N*****x. Favorite food: Spaghetti and meatballs

Aut omnis nobis ut assumenda libero eum dolorem culpa aut asperiores quod! Aut nobis omnis ea nemo debitis non nesciunt voluptas id necessitatibus ducimus est obcaecati voluptatum et nihil molestiae et dolorem voluptatem. Hic itaque vitae in quisquam explicabo ut accusamus sint? Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet. Ab reprehenderit consequatur ex voluptatem libero ea quibusdam laudantium. Qui omnis veritatis ex iusto iusto a aliquid tempora ab asperiores voluptates id molestias quis.